Please make sure you own these games if you are going to listen to their content!
News: Loading...
Quote:
Who:
Portal 2
Portal 2 DLC
Portal 2 PTI
Portal 2 Music
Portal 1
Portal 1 Music
Team Fortress 2
TF2 Music
Like
+1
Tweet
@Portal2Sounds
1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8
9
10
11
12
13
14
15
16
17
18
19
20
21
22
23
24
25
26
27
Popular
Original Order
Random
This site requires that
Javascript be enabled
.
Don't let that 'horrible person' thing discourage you. It's just a data point. If it makes you feel any better, science has now validated your birth mother's decision to abandon you on a doorstep.
Listens:
6496
Who:
GLaDOS
There should be a portal device on that podium over there.
Listens:
321
Who:
Wheatley
Oh! That's ME they're talking about!
Listens:
709
Who:
Wheatley
I can drop the fake praise.
Listens:
430
Who:
GLaDOS
Fine, 500 point penalty for Blue.
Listens:
713
Who:
GLaDOS
Oh.
Listens:
443
Who:
GLaDOS
I hope that was some kind of joke.
Listens:
424
Who:
GLaDOS
Halley's Comet can be viewed orbiting Earth every seventy-six years. For the other seventy-five, it retreats to the heart of the sun, where it hibernates undisturbed.
Listens:
942
Who:
Core 3
Alalalawl
Listens:
5629
Who:
Turret
Iguanas can stay underwater for twenty-eight point seven minutes.
Listens:
624
Who:
Core 3
Butterfingers.
Listens:
3973
Who:
Wheatley
Uhhh, no bullets. Sorry.
Listens:
538
Who:
Defective Turret
Antisocial.
Listens:
290
Who:
GLaDOS
You've probably figured it out by now, but I don't need you anymore.
Listens:
306
Who:
Wheatley
Blue
Listens:
1802
Who:
GLaDOS
Long bathroom breaks.
Listens:
348
Who:
GLaDOS
New template accepted.
Listens:
1420
Who:
Announcer
Calibrating Orange's weight...
Listens:
307
Who:
GLaDOS
Canvassing
Listens:
649
Who:
Turret
You know who ended up, do you know who ended up taking her down in the end? You're not going to believe this. A human.
Listens:
302
Who:
Wheatley
If you need to go to the bathroom after this next series of tests, please let a test associate know, because in all likelihood, whatever comes out of you is going to be coal. Only temporary, so do not worry. If it persists for a week, though, start worrying and come see us, because that's not supposed to happen.
Listens:
2584
Who:
Cave Johnson
You were right, Orange. Blue was dumb enough to fall for your trap.
Listens:
624
Who:
GLaDOS
HA! The tube's broken! We can ride it straight to her!
Listens:
300
Who:
Wheatley
You are simply experiencing a rare reaction in which the Material Emancipation Grill may have emancipated the ear tubes inside your head.
Listens:
1076
Who:
Announcer
Go ahead, plug me in.
Listens:
353
Who:
GLaDOS
This next test applies the principles of momentum to movement through portals. If the laws of physics no longer apply in the future, God help you.
Listens:
3982
Who:
Announcer
Okay, look, the point is, we're gonna break out of here! Very soon, I promise, I promise!
Listens:
302
Who:
Wheatley
What are you doing? Put me back this instant.
Listens:
386
Who:
GLaDOS
Okay, great! Here comes another core!
Listens:
331
Who:
GLaDOS
Might as well give you the tour.
Listens:
324
Who:
Wheatley
While teamwork is needed to complete these tests, I am not sure I trust the two of you together.
Listens:
291
Who:
GLaDOS
You will need him for the final track.
Listens:
300
Who:
GLaDOS
Look how small you are down there! I can barely see you! Very tiny and insignificant!
Listens:
381
Who:
Wheatley
Oh, hang on. What if we gave it something ELSE to scan?
Listens:
318
Who:
Wheatley
All right, your funeral. Your beautiful-lady-corpse open casket funeral.
Listens:
761
Who:
Core 2
The Fact Sphere is a good person, whose insights are relevant.
Listens:
728
Who:
Core 3
Look who's back, were you scared to continue those tests?
Listens:
298
Who:
GLaDOS
Can I help you?
Listens:
897
Who:
Turret
After you told me to turn the beam off, I thought I'd lost you. Went poking around for other test subjects. No luck there. Everyone's still all dead.
Listens:
440
Who:
Wheatley
Now let's continue testing.
Listens:
1152
Who:
GLaDOS
Oh I know! I know I know I know I know I know - let's go to space!
Listens:
1344
Who:
Core 1
Defective Turret testing active.
Listens:
963
Who:
Announcer
science collaboration points.
Listens:
729
Who:
GLaDOS
Allright, what have we got?
Listens:
285
Who:
Wheatley
Hello?
Listens:
2962
Who:
Turret
Remember when I told you that you were the only subjects to pass the calibration tests?
Listens:
330
Who:
GLaDOS
Back again? Maybe you can just stay and live here.
Listens:
310
Who:
GLaDOS
It shouldn't be hard to stay alive long enough to find him.
Listens:
306
Who:
GLaDOS
Insecure.
Listens:
321
Who:
GLaDOS
ow.
Listens:
711
Who:
GLaDOS
Yeah! Still not working.
Listens:
742
Who:
Defective Turret
Oh! What can we do with me then. I know! Plug me into the port, please.
Listens:
309
Who:
Wheatley
00:00 / 00:00
Test Player
Like these quotes? Share them with your friends!