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Portal 2
Portal 2 DLC
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Portal 1 Music
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TF2 Music
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You really do have brain damage, don't you?
Listens:
2185
Who:
GLaDOS
For that Blue is penalized fifty science collaboration points.
Listens:
1007
Who:
GLaDOS
Notice the moat area. Very deadly. Extremely dangerous. Eventually. Not at the moment. Still working on it, still working on it.
Listens:
432
Who:
Wheatley
You won't regret this!
Listens:
687
Who:
Defective Turret
You should see yourselves right now.
Listens:
1358
Who:
GLaDOS
Space!
Listens:
1341
Who:
Core 1
This lock requires humans.
Listens:
414
Who:
GLaDOS
The most poisonous fish in the world is the orange ruffy. Everything but its eyes are made of a deadly poison. The ruffy's eyes are composed of a less harmful, deadly poison.
Listens:
2419
Who:
Core 3
Blah.
Listens:
1991
Who:
GLaDOS
AGH! You look TERRIB--you look good. Looking good, actually. If I'm honest.
Listens:
802
Who:
Wheatley
And we would have talked our way out of it. Oh! Except you forgot to tell me you'd murdered her. And that she needed you to live, so the only available vent for her rage would be good old crushable Wheatley. Yeah. Little details I remember. Easy little tidbits you could have used to save me from getting crushed if you'd cared, which you didn't, obviously. And still don't.
Listens:
3331
Who:
Wheatley
As an impartial collaboration facilitator, it would be unfair of me to name my favorite member of your team. However, it’s perfectly fair to hint at it in a way that my least favorite member probably isn't smart enough to understand. Rhymeswithglue. Orange you are doing very well.
Listens:
1027
Who:
GLaDOS
Come on. Ohhhh. Hit me with it.
Listens:
603
Who:
Wheatley
Apparently this human escaped and nobody's seen him since.
Listens:
327
Who:
Wheatley
I never liked her.
Listens:
901
Who:
Turret
Is that camera is hooked into the lock?
Listens:
290
Who:
GLaDOS
Do either of you feel like laughing?
Listens:
1295
Who:
GLaDOS
In Greek myth, the craftsman Daedalus invented human flight so a group of Minotaurs would stop teasing him about it.
Listens:
862
Who:
Core 3
Two: Start the neurotoxin immediately.
Listens:
975
Who:
Wheatley
Whoa! Hey! Don't fall!
Listens:
309
Who:
Wheatley
Nooooo. No, I don't think it is. I think you're wrong.
Listens:
2150
Who:
Wheatley
Okay, let's try this way.
Listens:
425
Who:
Wheatley
Yeah! How'd you like that?
Listens:
433
Who:
Core 2
Turret redemption lines active.
Listens:
1694
Who:
Announcer
Of course the humans only had one try at it, you can just keep trying.
Listens:
328
Who:
GLaDOS
Blue, don't sink to Orange's level.
Listens:
317
Who:
GLaDOS
Alarmist.
Listens:
531
Who:
GLaDOS
Am I interrupting your important conversation?
Listens:
514
Who:
GLaDOS
There we go. I wanted to talk to you for a moment, if I may.
Listens:
303
Who:
Wheatley
And she will probably kill us if, um, she's awake.
Listens:
403
Who:
Wheatley
It's been a long time. How have you been?
Listens:
47834
Who:
GLaDOS
Grab it and attach it to him!
Listens:
330
Who:
GLaDOS
Better yet, don't say anything.
Listens:
284
Who:
Wheatley
Well... Good. Good. Finally, a nemesis worthy of my vast intellect.
Listens:
742
Who:
Wheatley
THREE! That's high. It's TOO high, isn't it, really, that--
Listens:
579
Who:
Wheatley
Do NOT plug that little idiot into MY mainframe.
Listens:
1900
Who:
GLaDOS
Spinning thing. Hmmm. Not sure.
Listens:
298
Who:
Wheatley
Yes.
Listens:
622
Who:
GLaDOS
Duck and weave, duck and weave! Ohh, the sweet science.
Listens:
509
Who:
Core 2
Dull expression.
Listens:
335
Who:
GLaDOS
I wonder if that dancing has some effect on you?
Listens:
505
Who:
GLaDOS
Hello?
Listens:
1354
Who:
Turret
Let's go in!
Listens:
314
Who:
Wheatley
There's a star. There's another one. Star. Star star star. Star.
Listens:
1607
Who:
Core 1
BLUE, please show me where you would like me to place a portal.
Listens:
354
Who:
GLaDOS
Not bad. I forgot how good you are at this. You should pace yourself, though. We have A LOT of tests to do.
Listens:
2467
Who:
GLaDOS
Programmed in one last tremor, for old time's sake.
Listens:
343
Who:
Wheatley
It's still going down! Keep it up!
Listens:
338
Who:
Wheatley
Lady.
Listens:
828
Who:
Core 1
I just now realized that I used to rely on my management rail to not fall into bottomless pits. And you're my rail now. And you can fall into bottomless pits. I'm rambling out of fear, but here's the point: don't get close to the edge.
Listens:
880
Who:
Wheatley
Riggght now.
Listens:
317
Who:
Wheatley
Watch and learn, everyone. Watch and learn.
Listens:
487
Who:
Defective Turret
Alright, off you go!
Listens:
325
Who:
Wheatley
Kick him! Or punch him. You're the boss, dimples.
Listens:
850
Who:
Core 2
This test is so outside the box, I can't-- I mean WON'T even tell you what you are looking for.
Listens:
324
Who:
GLaDOS
You're no longer bothering me. You're only hurting my impression of you.
Listens:
436
Who:
GLaDOS
I'll be honest, I might have heard that one before, though. Sort of cheating.
Listens:
379
Who:
Wheatley
YES YES! IN YOUR FACE! I GOT YO-ah, nope.
Listens:
4314
Who:
Wheatley
Look, I don't like this any more than you do. In fact, I like it less because I'm the one who got partially eaten by a bird.
Listens:
943
Who:
GLaDOS
Oh! But when I DO test... ohhhhh, man alive! Nothing feels better. It's just... why I've gotta test, I've gotta test!
Listens:
1841
Who:
Wheatley
GO.
Listens:
1088
Who:
GLaDOS
You just solved it, didn't you? I-told you to tell me before you... NNNNGH! Why are making this so HARD for me?
Listens:
560
Who:
Wheatley
Hey! Pick me up!
Listens:
671
Who:
Wheatley
Space space wanna go to space
Listens:
2302
Who:
Core 1
Wanna go to -- wanna go to space
Listens:
1020
Who:
Core 1
I have the results of the last chamber: You are a horrible person. That's what it says: A horrible person. We weren't even testing for that.
Listens:
3540
Who:
GLaDOS
I thought we fixed that.
Listens:
1012
Who:
Defective Turret
I have only met one other team closer and one of them was an imbecile I had to destroy.
Listens:
602
Who:
GLaDOS
Yes sir, Mister Johnson.
Listens:
1618
Who:
Caroline
Killing you? Is hard.
Listens:
1481
Who:
GLaDOS
I can drop the fake praise.
Listens:
430
Who:
GLaDOS
You seem to have defeated its load-bearing capacity. Well done. I'll just lower the ceiling.
Listens:
545
Who:
GLaDOS
Just remember to land on one foot...
Listens:
394
Who:
GLaDOS
Allright, what have we got?
Listens:
285
Who:
Wheatley
Whales are twice as intelligent, and three times as delicious, as humans.
Listens:
1712
Who:
Core 3
I know you.
Listens:
571
Who:
GLaDOS
Avocados have the highest fiber and calories of any fruit. They are found in Australians.
Listens:
1035
Who:
Core 3
Why...
Listens:
2840
Who:
Turret
Keep it up, baby! You're creamin' him!
Listens:
475
Who:
Core 2
Are you okay? Are you - Don't answer that. I'm absolutely sure you're fine. There's plenty of time for you to recover. Just take it slow.
Listens:
528
Who:
Wheatley
We are?
Listens:
689
Who:
Core 1
New template accepted.
Listens:
1419
Who:
Announcer
For instance, Blue, you just lost two opportunity advisement points.
Listens:
306
Who:
GLaDOS
I'll bet you're both dying to know what your big surprise is. Only TWO more chambers!
Listens:
477
Who:
Wheatley
Gonna be in space.
Listens:
1001
Who:
Core 1
After that...who knows? I might take up a hobby. Reanimating the dead, maybe.
Listens:
859
Who:
GLaDOS
No, you should plug that little idiot into the mainframe!
Listens:
703
Who:
Wheatley
Where are you going? Don't run! Don't run! I'll tell you why you shouldn't run: The harder you breathe, the more neurotoxin you'll inhale. It's bloody clever, this stuff. Seriously, it's devilish.
Listens:
658
Who:
Wheatley
In case you were wondering, you do not need to be crushed to solve this test.
Listens:
323
Who:
GLaDOS
You didn't think you were the first, did you? [laughs] No. Fifth. No, I lie: Sixth. Perhaps it's best to leave it to your imagination what happened to the other five...
Listens:
846
Who:
Wheatley
Help! Being squished!
Listens:
1381
Who:
Turret
That jumpsuit you're wearing looks stupid. That's not me talking, it's right here in your file. On other people it looks fine, but right here a scientist has noted that on you it looks 'stupid.'
Listens:
2641
Who:
GLaDOS
Hey hey hey hey hey!
Listens:
1247
Who:
Core 1
Hey! Hey! Up here!
Listens:
349
Who:
Wheatley
Ohhhh, now he's playing classical music.
Listens:
3702
Who:
GLaDOS
QUICK: WHAT'S THE SITUATION? Oh, hey, hi pretty lady. My name's Rick. So, you out having a little adventure?
Listens:
7791
Who:
Core 2
From here we transport you to the new testing course.
Listens:
349
Who:
GLaDOS
Goodbye, sir.
Listens:
3995
Who:
GLaDOS
Tell ya what, why don't you put me down and I'll make a distraction.
Listens:
460
Who:
Core 2
If you can't complete these tests, we will never free the humans!
Listens:
302
Who:
GLaDOS
00:00 / 00:00
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