Please make sure you own these games if you are going to listen to their content!
News: Loading...
Quote:
Who:
Portal 2
Portal 2 DLC
Portal 2 PTI
Portal 2 Music
Portal 1
Portal 1 Music
Team Fortress 2
TF2 Music
Like
+1
Tweet
@Portal2Sounds
1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8
9
10
11
12
13
14
15
16
17
18
19
20
21
22
23
24
25
26
27
Popular
Original Order
Random
This site requires that
Javascript be enabled
.
I'll meet you on the other side!
Listens:
308
Who:
Wheatley
You're okay! Great! Come on!
Listens:
318
Who:
Wheatley
We have to get you out of there!
Listens:
320
Who:
Wheatley
Can you get out?
Listens:
290
Who:
Wheatley
What's going on in there?
Listens:
354
Who:
Wheatley
Try to make your way back out here!
Listens:
330
Who:
Wheatley
I heard gunfire! A bit late for this, but look out for gunfire! Probably doesn't help at this point, but I have at least tried.
Listens:
502
Who:
Wheatley
Just turn around.
Listens:
297
Who:
Wheatley
Go on, just turn right around. So you're not looking at me.
Listens:
303
Who:
Wheatley
Turn around. I'll only be a second. If you don't mind.
Listens:
376
Who:
Wheatley
Would you mind putting your back towards me? So I can see only your back. And not your face.
Listens:
312
Who:
Wheatley
Could you turn around? Is that possible?
Listens:
291
Who:
Wheatley
WHAT ARE YOU DOING WE DON'T KNOW WHAT THAT BUTTON - oh, the door's open! Well done. Let's see what's inside.
Listens:
2856
Who:
Wheatley
Do you smell neurotoxin?
Listens:
608
Who:
Wheatley
Hold on! The neurotoxin levels are going down.
Listens:
375
Who:
Wheatley
So whatever you're doing, keep doing it!
Listens:
302
Who:
Wheatley
Come on! We have to go!
Listens:
289
Who:
Wheatley
Hurry!
Listens:
325
Who:
Wheatley
I can't hold on! Come on!
Listens:
320
Who:
Wheatley
GET IN!
Listens:
322
Who:
Wheatley
GET IN!
Listens:
330
Who:
Wheatley
[laugh] Our handiwork. Shouldn't laugh. They do feel pain. Of a sort. All simulated. But real enough for them I suppose.
Listens:
745
Who:
Wheatley
Good news! I can use this equipment to shut down the neurotoxin system. It is, however, password protected. AH! Alarm bells! No. Don't worry. Not a problem for me.
Listens:
569
Who:
Wheatley
You may as well have a little rest, actually, while I work on it.
Listens:
316
Who:
Wheatley
Ok... Here we go...
Listens:
347
Who:
Wheatley
The hardest part of any hack is the figuring-out-how-to-start phase. That's always tricky. But... Let the games begin.
Listens:
948
Who:
Wheatley
Allright, what have we got?
Listens:
289
Who:
Wheatley
A computer. Not a surprise. Expected. Check that off the list. Computer identified. Tick.
Listens:
521
Who:
Wheatley
There is a box part here. Probably got some electronics in there.
Listens:
291
Who:
Wheatley
And a monitor. Yes. That'll be important, I imagine. I'll keep my eye on that. In case something useful comes up like 'password identified' or something like that.
Listens:
390
Who:
Wheatley
And there's a flat bit. Not sure what that is. But: noted. If anyone says to me is there a flat bit? Yes, there it is.
Listens:
560
Who:
Wheatley
Spinning thing. Hmmm. Not sure.
Listens:
301
Who:
Wheatley
The floor. What's the floor doing? What's the floor up to? Do you know what? It's holding everything up. The floor is important, holding everything up.
Listens:
751
Who:
Wheatley
Pens. Might need those. Don't see any though. So...
Listens:
351
Who:
Wheatley
If we start making a list of things that aren't here, we could be here all night. You know, pens for instance. Let's stick with things we can see. Not stuff that isn't here.
Listens:
356
Who:
Wheatley
Allright. Preparing to interface with the neurotoxin central control circuit. Begin: 'Ello, guv! Neurotoxin inspectah! Need to shut this place down for a moment! Here's my credentials. Shut yourself down. I am totally legit. From the board of international neurotoxin... um... observers. From the United... Arab Emirates. Hello.
Listens:
3894
Who:
Wheatley
Nothing. He's good. This one. He is good. I'm gonna need to break out the expert level hacking maneuvers now. You asked for it Mate.
Listens:
516
Who:
Wheatley
'Caw! Caw!' Oh, look! There's a bird out here! A Lovely bird. Gorgeous plumage. Majestic. Won't be here long. A lovely bird like that. Once in a lifetime opportunity to see a lovely bird like that. Lovely plumage.
Listens:
4234
Who:
Wheatley
Be a shame to miss it, wouldn't it? Just for the old neurotoxin. Neurotoxin will still be here tomorrow. Whereas that bird will be gone any minute. Already got one talon off the branch. Gonna be gone.
Listens:
648
Who:
Wheatley
Oh, it's fluttering its wings. Tell you what, mate. I'll come in there for a minute and cover you so you can have a look at this lovely bird! I'll come in. I'll do all the neurotoxin stuff. And then you come out here and look at this. Because it is lovely. It is lovely. You want to get out here fast. Seriously, my pleasure sounds are going to frighten the bird away any second. Ohhh, it's not working, is it? He's not interested in bloody birds.
Listens:
3225
Who:
Wheatley
That did it! Neurotoxin at zero percent! Yes!
Listens:
374
Who:
Wheatley
Hold on -
Listens:
339
Who:
Wheatley
It's still going down! Keep it up!
Listens:
347
Who:
Wheatley
Hold on, something's wrong! Neurotoxin level's up to 50%! No, it's down. Sorry, my mistake. I meant to say it's down to fifty percent. Good news! Carry on!
Listens:
573
Who:
Wheatley
Ha! I knew we were going the right way.
Listens:
289
Who:
Wheatley
This is the neurotoxin generator. Bit bigger than I expected. Not going to be able to just, you know, push it over. Have to apply some cleverness.
Listens:
911
Who:
Wheatley
There's some sort of control room up top. Let's go investigate.
Listens:
306
Who:
Wheatley
What are you doing in there?
Listens:
321
Who:
Wheatley
What's going on?
Listens:
297
Who:
Wheatley
Are you alright?
Listens:
343
Who:
Wheatley
I'm afraid the door's locked. Just checked it. No way to hack it as far as I can tell. The mechanism must be on the -oh, now look at that. That's a big laser!
Listens:
490
Who:
Wheatley
Probably best to ignore it, though. Just leave it be. We don't know where those panels it's cutting are going. Could be somewhere important.
Listens:
303
Who:
Wheatley
Though it does give me an idea: WHAT if we stand here and let the gentle hum of the laser transport us to a state of absolute relaxation. Might help us think of a way to open the door.
Listens:
360
Who:
Wheatley
Not much of a plan, if I'm honest. But I'm afraid it's all we have at his point. Barring a sudden barrage of speech from your direction. Improbable. At best.
Listens:
295
Who:
Wheatley
Alright, so, silent contemplation it is. Mysterious button... Sorry. Sorry. Silence. Do not speak. In the silence. Let the silence descend. Here it comes. One hundred percent silence. From now. By the way, if you come up with any ideas, do flag them up. Don't feel you have to stay quiet because I've said absolute silence. So if you come up with an idea, mention it. Otherwise, absolute silence starting... Now.
Listens:
1836
Who:
Wheatley
Look at that, it's growing right up into the ceiling. The whole place is probably overrun with potatoes at this point. At least you won't starve, though.
Listens:
1629
Who:
Wheatley
Baking Soda Volcano. Well, at least it's not a potato battery, I'll give it that. Still not terrifically original, though. Not exactly primary research, even within the child sciences.
Listens:
1081
Who:
Wheatley
I'm guessing this wasn't one of the scientist's children. I don't want to be snobby, but let's be honest: It's got manual laborer written all over it. I'm not saying they're not as good as the professionals. They're just a lot dumber.
Listens:
650
Who:
Wheatley
HA! The tube's broken! We can ride it straight to her!
Listens:
302
Who:
Wheatley
This place is huge.
Listens:
372
Who:
Wheatley
And we're only seeing the top layer. It goes down for miles.
Listens:
333
Who:
Wheatley
All sealed off years ago, of course.
Listens:
305
Who:
Wheatley
Exactly how painful are we tAGHHHHHH!
Listens:
1274
Who:
Wheatley
Pull me out pull me out pull me out pull me out pull me out pull me out pull me out!
Listens:
2957
Who:
Wheatley
Here, come and have a look out the window. It's good.
Listens:
316
Who:
Wheatley
Go on, just walk up to the window and take a look out.
Listens:
340
Who:
Wheatley
It's interesting. You won't regret it. I promise.
Listens:
348
Who:
Wheatley
Just... have a look through the old window.
Listens:
325
Who:
Wheatley
Just glass. Transparent. Smooth. Not going to hurt you. Have a look.
Listens:
355
Who:
Wheatley
Go on. Walk up to the window. Take a look out.
Listens:
290
Who:
Wheatley
Aggh! I'm going the wrong way!
Listens:
353
Who:
Wheatley
Woooo! I KNEW this would be fun. They told me it wasn't fun at all, and I BELIEVED 'em! Ah! I'm loving this! Whale of a time...
Listens:
717
Who:
Wheatley
This should take us right to her. I can't believe I'm finally doing this!
Listens:
289
Who:
Wheatley
We should be getting close. Ohh, I can't wait to see the look on her face. No neurotoxin, no turrets--she'll never know what hit her!
Listens:
411
Who:
Wheatley
Hold on now. I might not have thought this next part COMPLETELY through.
Listens:
340
Who:
Wheatley
Get to HER! I'll find you!
Listens:
297
Who:
Wheatley
Ugh!
Listens:
324
Who:
Wheatley
Agh!
Listens:
331
Who:
Wheatley
Enh!
Listens:
346
Who:
Wheatley
Agh!
Listens:
328
Who:
Wheatley
Ow!
Listens:
421
Who:
Wheatley
Gah!
Listens:
432
Who:
Wheatley
Ooagh!
Listens:
366
Who:
Wheatley
Ungh!
Listens:
332
Who:
Wheatley
GAH!
Listens:
509
Who:
Wheatley
Aggggh!
Listens:
354
Who:
Wheatley
Hey! Hey! It's me! I'm okay!
Listens:
504
Who:
Wheatley
You'll never believe what happened! There I was, just lying there, you thought I was done for, but --
Listens:
420
Who:
Wheatley
A bloody bird! Right? Couldn't believe it either. And then the bird--
Listens:
1224
Who:
Wheatley
Can you see the portal gun?
Listens:
532
Who:
Wheatley
Also, are you alive? That's important, should have asked that first.
Listens:
755
Who:
Wheatley
Hello?
Listens:
754
Who:
Wheatley
I'm--do you know what I'm going to do? I'm going to work on the assumption that you're still alive and I'm just going to wait for you up ahead.
Listens:
393
Who:
Wheatley
I'll wait--I'll wait one hour. Then I'll come back and, assuming I can locate your dead body, I'll bury you. Alright? Brilliant! Go team! See you in an hour! Hopefully! If you're not... dead.
Listens:
838
Who:
Wheatley
Hey! Oi oi! I'm up here!
Listens:
488
Who:
Wheatley
Whoa!
Listens:
345
Who:
Wheatley
There should be a portal device on that podium over there.
Listens:
329
Who:
Wheatley
I can't see it though... Maybe it fell off. Do you want to go and have a quick look?
Listens:
346
Who:
Wheatley
Hey hey! You made it!
Listens:
312
Who:
Wheatley
It's alright. No, go on, just have a look about.
Listens:
338
Who:
Wheatley
00:00 / 00:00
Test Player
Like these quotes? Share them with your friends!
