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Portal 2
Portal 2 DLC
Portal 2 PTI
Portal 2 Music
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Portal 1 Music
Team Fortress 2
TF2 Music
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QUICK: WHAT'S THE SITUATION? Oh, hey, hi pretty lady. My name's Rick. So, you out having a little adventure?
Listens:
7825
Who:
Core 2
QUICK: WHAT'S THE SITUATION? Oh, hello angel. I guess I must have died and gone to heaven. Name's Rick. So, you out having yourself a little adventure?
Listens:
3784
Who:
Core 2
What, are you fighting that guy? You got that under control? You know, because, looks like there's a lot of stuff on fire...
Listens:
1426
Who:
Core 2
Hey, a countdown clock! Man, that is trouble. Situation's looking pretty ugly. For such a beautiful woman. If you don't mind me saying.
Listens:
1361
Who:
Core 2
I don't want to scare you, but, I'm an Adventure Sphere. Designed for danger. So, why don't you go ahead and have yourself a little lady break, and I'll just take it from here.
Listens:
1511
Who:
Core 2
Here, stand behind me. Yeah, just like that. Just like you're doing. Things are about to get real messy.
Listens:
692
Who:
Core 2
Going for it yourself, huh? All right, angel. I'll do what I can to cover you.
Listens:
592
Who:
Core 2
Doesn't bother me. I gotta say, the view's mighty nice from right here.
Listens:
530
Who:
Core 2
Man, that clock is moving fast. And you are beautiful. Always time to compliment a pretty lady. All right, back to work. Let's do this.
Listens:
754
Who:
Core 2
I'll tell ya, it's times like this I wish I had a waist so I could wear all my black belts. Yeah, I'm a black belt. In pretty much everything. Karate. Larate. Jiu Jitsu. Kick punching. Belt making. Taekwondo... Bedroom.
Listens:
17081
Who:
Core 2
I am a coiled spring right now. Tension and power. Just... I'm a muscle. Like a big arm muscle, punching through a brick wall, and it's hitting the wall so hard the arm is catching on fire. Oh yeah.
Listens:
4029
Who:
Core 2
I probably wouldn't have let things get this far, but you go ahead and do things your way.
Listens:
818
Who:
Core 2
Tell ya what, why don't you put me down and I'll make a distraction.
Listens:
471
Who:
Core 2
All right. You create a distraction then, and I'll distract him from YOUR distraction.
Listens:
432
Who:
Core 2
All right, your funeral. Your beautiful-lady-corpse open casket funeral.
Listens:
774
Who:
Core 2
Do you have a gun? Because I should really have a gun. What is that thing you're holding?
Listens:
591
Who:
Core 2
How about a knife, then? You keep the gun, I'll use a knife.
Listens:
557
Who:
Core 2
No knife? That's fine. I know all about pressure points.
Listens:
489
Who:
Core 2
So, when you kill that guy, do you have a cool line? You know, prepared? Tell you what: Lemme help you with that while you run around.
Listens:
528
Who:
Core 2
Okay, let's see. Cool line... He's... big. He's... just hangin' there. Okay. Yeah, all right, here we go: 'Hang around.' That might be too easy.
Listens:
580
Who:
Core 2
'Hang ten?' That might work if there were ten of him. Do you think there might be nine more of this guy somewhere?
Listens:
649
Who:
Core 2
All right, you know what, it's gonna be best if you can get him to say something first. It's just better if I have a set-up.
Listens:
436
Who:
Core 2
Here's the plan: Get him to say, 'You two have been a thorn in my side long enough.' Then tell your pretty ears to stand back, because I am going to zing him into the stone age.
Listens:
635
Who:
Core 2
Here's the plan: Get him to say, 'You two have been a thorn in my side long enough.' Then tell your pretty ears to stand back, because I am going to zing him into space.
Listens:
2211
Who:
Core 2
Don't forget! Thorn! Side!
Listens:
700
Who:
Core 2
'Yeah? Well this thorn... is about to take you down.' Man, that sounded a whole lot better in my head.
Listens:
1018
Who:
Core 2
'Yeah? Well this thorn... is about to take you down.' Oh yeah!
Listens:
709
Who:
Core 2
Okay, have it your way. What, are you fighting that guy? You got that under control there? Cuz it looks like there's a lot of stuff on fire...
Listens:
542
Who:
Core 2
Did you hear that? I think something just exploded. Man, we are in a lot of danger. This is like Christmas. No, it's better than Christmas. This should be its own holiday. Explosion Day!
Listens:
2366
Who:
Core 2
Happy Explosion Day, gorgeous.
Listens:
3373
Who:
Core 2
Kick him! Or punch him. You're the boss, dimples.
Listens:
866
Who:
Core 2
Yeah! Nice!
Listens:
609
Who:
Core 2
You messed with the wrong woman!
Listens:
785
Who:
Core 2
Yeah! How'd you like that?
Listens:
446
Who:
Core 2
How's that taste, pal?
Listens:
471
Who:
Core 2
Keep it up, baby! You're creamin' him!
Listens:
479
Who:
Core 2
Duck and weave, duck and weave! Ohh, the sweet science.
Listens:
517
Who:
Core 2
You're doing great!
Listens:
455
Who:
Core 2
Come on, sweetie! He's got a glass jaw! He's got a glass everything! This guy's a china cabinet!
Listens:
747
Who:
Core 2
This ain't Marquis of Queensberry Rules, sweetie! Pour on the mustard!
Listens:
597
Who:
Core 2
Get dirty with this robot! This robot owes you money! This robot owes! You! Money!
Listens:
1332
Who:
Core 2
Shake it off! Shake it off!
Listens:
527
Who:
Core 2
Here, let me put on some adventure music.
Listens:
982
Who:
Core 2
Pfff. I guess.
Listens:
559
Who:
Core 2
Pff. Whatever.
Listens:
591
Who:
Core 2
Oh, shut up!
Listens:
2361
Who:
Core 2
Nobody cares, four eyes.
Listens:
1242
Who:
Core 2
If you had underwear? And a butt? I would pull your underwear... right up your butt.
Listens:
26840
Who:
Core 2
Tell it to the bad guy. Maybe you'll make him so bored his brain'll explode.
Listens:
590
Who:
Core 2
You know who found that interesting? Nobody. That didn't affect anybody's life in any way whatsoever. Life would be exactly the same if you hadn't said anything.
Listens:
2097
Who:
Core 2
You ever notice how nobody stops what they're doing to listen? We don't care.
Listens:
601
Who:
Core 2
Say one useful thing. One. I dare you. I will give you a hundred dollars if you say one thing remotely applicable to anything at all.
Listens:
1413
Who:
Core 2
Dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-DUN! DUN DUN! Dunna-dunna-na-dunna-na-DUN! DUN DUN! nananaDUNDUNDUN dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun...
Listens:
4301
Who:
Core 2
Dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-action and adventure-dunna-dunna-na-dunna-na-playing by our own rules-nanana-hanging by our fingers from a mountain-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun...
Listens:
114064
Who:
Core 2
Oh shut up!
Listens:
1715
Who:
Core 2
There's nothing in space! That's why it's space!
Listens:
5724
Who:
Core 2
Oh, really? Space? Really? You should have said something! We had no idea!
Listens:
1972
Who:
Core 2
You know what I hope's in space? Fire. I hope you go to space and catch on fire.
Listens:
5502
Who:
Core 2
Dammit, we know! Everybody knows! Space! You! In it! We get it!
Listens:
32044
Who:
Core 2
Federal regulations require me to warn you that this next test chamber... is looking pretty good.
Listens:
35225
Who:
GLaDOS
That's right. The facility is completely operational again.
Listens:
2537
Who:
GLaDOS
I think these test chambers look even better than they did before. It was easy, really. You just have to look at things objectively, see what you don't need anymore, and trim out the fat.
Listens:
3588
Who:
GLaDOS
Stop it!
Listens:
5592
Who:
GLaDOS
What if you froze like that?
Listens:
2232
Who:
GLaDOS
There must be something wrong with the reassembly machine.
Listens:
1213
Who:
GLaDOS
You should see yourselves right now.
Listens:
1371
Who:
GLaDOS
Is it fun when you degrade yourselves like that?
Listens:
1250
Who:
GLaDOS
Okay, fine. Let's all act like humans. 'Look at me. Boy, do I love sweating. Let's convert beef and leaves into energy and excrete them later and go shopping.'
Listens:
47042
Who:
GLaDOS
You really aren't getting tired of that, are you?
Listens:
1396
Who:
GLaDOS
Just stop flailing around like an incompetent.
Listens:
1323
Who:
GLaDOS
For that Blue is penalized fifty science collaboration points.
Listens:
1017
Who:
GLaDOS
For that Orange is penalized fifty science collaboration points.
Listens:
639
Who:
GLaDOS
That's another fifty point penalty.
Listens:
621
Who:
GLaDOS
Keep it up and you will lose 500 points.
Listens:
891
Who:
GLaDOS
Fine, 500 point penalty for Blue.
Listens:
728
Who:
GLaDOS
Fine, 500 point penalty for Orange.
Listens:
636
Who:
GLaDOS
5000 point penalty! Are you happy now?
Listens:
1779
Who:
GLaDOS
I'm done.
Listens:
1338
Who:
GLaDOS
Good. You made it to one of the human habitats. We're looking for an artifact. Think of it as an archeological dig.
Listens:
971
Who:
GLaDOS
Their laughter centered around one of the objects in this room.
Listens:
725
Who:
GLaDOS
That's it. Scan it for me.
Listens:
670
Who:
GLaDOS
So... this cat loves lasagna so much that he eats all of the lasagna in his house. Okay, apparently it's not the cat's house or his lasagna. Oh good! The man who owns the lasagna is furious!
Listens:
70704
Who:
GLaDOS
The end.
Listens:
1651
Who:
GLaDOS
The end?
Listens:
1232
Who:
GLaDOS
That's not funny.
Listens:
1850
Who:
GLaDOS
Do either of you feel like laughing?
Listens:
1316
Who:
GLaDOS
Alright, I'm pulling you out.
Listens:
751
Who:
GLaDOS
Welcome back. While you were dead, I reworked the cartoon. It's up on the screen.
Listens:
2328
Who:
GLaDOS
As you can see, in my version the man points out to the cat that the house is equipped with deadly neurotoxin dispensers.
Listens:
1585
Who:
GLaDOS
At which point the cat reflects on the time he ate all of the man's lasagna and feels remorse.
Listens:
1458
Who:
GLaDOS
Briefly.
Listens:
776
Who:
GLaDOS
Reactions?
Listens:
605
Who:
GLaDOS
Yes, it's funny because most of it actually happened.
Listens:
958
Who:
GLaDOS
Do you feel more human?
Listens:
700
Who:
GLaDOS
Well, let's do some tests and see what happens.
Listens:
546
Who:
GLaDOS
Excellent. Although great science is always the result of collaboration, keep in mind that, like Albert Einstein and his cousin Terry, history will only remember one of you.
Listens:
1873
Who:
GLaDOS
To reiterate: This is not a competition.
Listens:
715
Who:
GLaDOS
Still, if it were, Blue would be winning.
Listens:
618
Who:
GLaDOS
Still, if it were, Orange would be winning.
Listens:
464
Who:
GLaDOS
It's not, though.
Listens:
647
Who:
GLaDOS
00:00 / 00:00
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