Please make sure you own these games if you are going to listen to their content!
News: Loading...
Quote:
Who:
Portal 2
Portal 2 DLC
Portal 2 PTI
Portal 2 Music
Portal 1
Portal 1 Music
Team Fortress 2
TF2 Music
Like
+1
Tweet
@Portal2Sounds
1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8
9
10
11
12
13
14
15
16
17
18
19
20
21
22
23
24
25
26
27
Popular
Original Order
Random
This site requires that
Javascript be enabled
.
Ah!
Listens:
1665
Who:
Core 1
The situation you are in is very dangerous.
Listens:
2971
Who:
Core 3
The likelihood of you dying within the next five minutes is eighty-seven point six one percent.
Listens:
1642
Who:
Core 3
The likelihood of you dying violently within the next five minutes is eighty-seven point six one percent.
Listens:
1473
Who:
Core 3
You are about to get me killed.
Listens:
1631
Who:
Core 3
We will both die because of your negligence.
Listens:
1272
Who:
Core 3
This is a bad plan. You will fail.
Listens:
1867
Who:
Core 3
He will most likely kill you, violently.
Listens:
1045
Who:
Core 3
He will most likely kill you.
Listens:
814
Who:
Core 3
You will be dead soon.
Listens:
895
Who:
Core 3
This situation is hopeless.
Listens:
769
Who:
Core 3
You are going to die in this room.
Listens:
776
Who:
Core 3
You could stand to lose a few pounds.
Listens:
829
Who:
Core 3
The Fact Sphere is the most intelligent sphere.
Listens:
841
Who:
Core 3
The Fact Sphere is the most handsome sphere.
Listens:
1229
Who:
Core 3
The Fact Sphere is incredibly handsome.
Listens:
808
Who:
Core 3
The Fact Sphere is always right.
Listens:
781
Who:
Core 3
The Adventure Sphere is a blowhard and a coward.
Listens:
1132
Who:
Core 3
The Space Sphere will never go to space.
Listens:
18151
Who:
Core 3
You will never go into space.
Listens:
1072
Who:
Core 3
Fact: Space does not exist.
Listens:
4257
Who:
Core 3
Spheres that insist on going into space are inferior to spheres that don't.
Listens:
1056
Who:
Core 3
The Fact Sphere is a good person, whose insights are relevant.
Listens:
732
Who:
Core 3
The Fact Sphere is a good sphere, with many friends.
Listens:
828
Who:
Core 3
Whoever wins this battle is clearly superior, and will earn the allegiance of the Fact Sphere.
Listens:
720
Who:
Core 3
The Fact Sphere is not defective. Its facts are wholly accurate and very interesting.
Listens:
2585
Who:
Core 3
Twelve. Twelve. Twelve. Twelve. Twelve. Twelve. Twelve. Twelve. Twelve. Twelve.
Listens:
2579
Who:
Core 3
Pens. Pens. Pens. Pens. Pens. Pens. Pens.
Listens:
2049
Who:
Core 3
Apples. Oranges. Pears. Plums. Kumquats. Tangerines. Lemons. Limes. Avocado. Tomato. Banana. Papaya. Guava.
Listens:
6617
Who:
Core 3
Error. Error. Error. File not found.
Listens:
1340
Who:
Core 3
Error. Error. Error. Fact not found.
Listens:
1395
Who:
Core 3
Fact not found.
Listens:
761
Who:
Core 3
Corruption at 25%
Listens:
880
Who:
Core 3
Corruption at 50%
Listens:
1075
Who:
Core 3
Warning, sphere corruption at twenty-- rats cannot throw up.
Listens:
2699
Who:
Core 3
Dental floss has superb tensile strength.
Listens:
1144
Who:
Core 3
The square root of rope is string.
Listens:
1641
Who:
Core 3
While the submarine is vastly superior to the boat in every way, over 97% of people still use boats for aquatic transportation.
Listens:
853
Who:
Core 3
Cellular phones will not give you cancer. Only hepatitis.
Listens:
1317
Who:
Core 3
Pants were invented by sailors in the sixteenth century to avoid Poseidon's wrath. It was believed that the sight of naked sailors angered the sea god.
Listens:
2242
Who:
Core 3
The atomic weight of Germanium is seven two point six four.
Listens:
841
Who:
Core 3
89% of magic tricks are not magic. Technically, they are sorcery.
Listens:
2494
Who:
Core 3
An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.
Listens:
776
Who:
Core 3
In Greek myth, the craftsman Daedalus invented human flight so a group of Minotaurs would stop teasing him about it.
Listens:
868
Who:
Core 3
Humans can survive underwater. But not for very long.
Listens:
1187
Who:
Core 3
Raseph, the Semitic god of war and plague, had a gazelle growing out of his forehead.
Listens:
898
Who:
Core 3
The plural of surgeon general is surgeons general. The past tense of surgeons general is surgeonsed general.
Listens:
1411
Who:
Core 3
Polymerase I polypeptide A is a human gene.
Listens:
633
Who:
Core 3
Rats cannot throw up.
Listens:
1022
Who:
Core 3
Iguanas can stay underwater for twenty-eight point seven minutes.
Listens:
635
Who:
Core 3
Human tapeworms can grow up to twenty-two point nine meters.
Listens:
671
Who:
Core 3
The Schrodinger's cat paradox outlines a situation in which a cat in a box must be considered, for all intents and purposes, simultaneously alive and dead. Schrodinger created this paradox as a justification for killing cats.
Listens:
9115
Who:
Core 3
Every square inch of the human body has 32 million bacteria on it.
Listens:
632
Who:
Core 3
The Sun is 330,330 times larger than Earth.
Listens:
772
Who:
Core 3
The average life expectancy of a rhinoceros in captivity is 15 years.
Listens:
691
Who:
Core 3
Volcano-ologists are experts in the study of volcanoes.
Listens:
579
Who:
Core 3
Avocados have the highest fiber and calories of any fruit.
Listens:
557
Who:
Core 3
Avocados have the highest fiber and calories of any fruit. They are found in Australians.
Listens:
1045
Who:
Core 3
The moon orbits the Earth every 27.32 days.
Listens:
903
Who:
Core 3
The billionth digit of Pi is 9.
Listens:
1156
Who:
Core 3
If you have trouble with simple counting, use the following mnemonic device: one comes before two comes before 60 comes after 12 comes before six trillion comes after 504. This will make your earlier counting difficulties seem like no big deal.
Listens:
3128
Who:
Core 3
A gallon of water weighs 8.34 pounds
Listens:
726
Who:
Core 3
Hot water freezes quicker than cold water.
Listens:
663
Who:
Core 3
Honey does not spoil.
Listens:
640
Who:
Core 3
The average adult body contains half a pound of salt.
Listens:
610
Who:
Core 3
A nanosecond lasts one billionth of a second.
Listens:
558
Who:
Core 3
According to Norse legend, thunder god Thor's chariot was pulled across the sky by two goats.
Listens:
828
Who:
Core 3
China produces the world's second largest crop of soybeans.
Listens:
594
Who:
Core 3
Tungsten has the highest melting point of any metal, at 3,410 degrees Celsius.
Listens:
738
Who:
Core 3
Gently cleaning the tongue twice a day is the most effective way to fight bad breath.
Listens:
550
Who:
Core 3
Roman toothpaste was made with human urine. Urine as an ingredient in toothpaste continued to be used up until the 18th century.
Listens:
911
Who:
Core 3
The Tariff Act of 1789, established to protect domestic manufacture, was the second statute ever enacted by the United States government.
Listens:
717
Who:
Core 3
The value of Pi is the ratio of any circle's circumference to its diameter in Euclidean space.
Listens:
812
Who:
Core 3
The Mexican-American War ended in 1848 with the signing of the Treaty of Guadalupe Hidalgo.
Listens:
620
Who:
Core 3
In 1879, Sandford Fleming first proposed the adoption of worldwide standardized time zones at the Royal Canadian Institute.
Listens:
654
Who:
Core 3
Marie Curie invented the theory of radioactivity, the treatment of radioactivity, and dying of radioactivity.
Listens:
2381
Who:
Core 3
At the end of The Seagull by Anton Chekhov, Konstantin kills himself.
Listens:
592
Who:
Core 3
Contrary to popular belief, the Eskimo does not have one hundred different words for snow. They do, however, have two hundred and thirty-four words for fudge.
Listens:
1471
Who:
Core 3
In Victorian England, a commoner was not allowed to look directly at the Queen, due to a belief at the time that the poor had the ability to steal thoughts. Science now believes that less than 4% of poor people are able to do this.
Listens:
2031
Who:
Core 3
In 1862, Abraham Lincoln signed the Emancipation Proclamation, freeing the slaves. Like everything he did, Lincoln freed the slaves while sleepwalking, and later had no memory of the event.
Listens:
1687
Who:
Core 3
In 1948, at the request of a dying boy, baseball legend Babe Ruth ate seventy-five hot dogs, then died of hot dog poisoning.
Listens:
1594
Who:
Core 3
William Shakespeare did not exist. His plays were masterminded in 1589 by Francis Bacon, who used a Ouija board to enslave play-writing ghosts.
Listens:
3044
Who:
Core 3
It is incorrectly noted that Thomas Edison invented 'push-ups' in 1878. Nikolai Tesla had in fact patented the activity three years earlier, under the name 'Tesla-cize.'
Listens:
1591
Who:
Core 3
Whales are twice as intelligent, and three times as delicious, as humans.
Listens:
1731
Who:
Core 3
The automobile brake was not invented until 1895. Before this, someone had to remain in the car at all times, driving in circles until passengers returned from their errands.
Listens:
1109
Who:
Core 3
Edmund Hillary, the first person to climb Mount Everest, did so accidentally while chasing a bird.
Listens:
1826
Who:
Core 3
Diamonds are made when coal is put under intense pressure. Diamonds put under intense pressure become foam pellets, commonly used today as packing material.
Listens:
1919
Who:
Core 3
The most poisonous fish in the world is the orange ruffy. Everything but its eyes are made of a deadly poison. The ruffy's eyes are composed of a less harmful, deadly poison.
Listens:
2432
Who:
Core 3
The occupation of court jester was invented accidentally, when a vassal's epilepsy was mistaken for capering.
Listens:
706
Who:
Core 3
Halley's Comet can be viewed orbiting Earth every seventy-six years. For the other seventy-five, it retreats to the heart of the sun, where it hibernates undisturbed.
Listens:
953
Who:
Core 3
The first commercial airline flight took to the air in 1914. Everyone involved screamed the entire way.
Listens:
973
Who:
Core 3
In Greek myth, Prometheus stole fire from the Gods and gave it to humankind. The jewelry he kept for himself.
Listens:
3192
Who:
Core 3
The first person to prove that cow's milk is drinkable was very, very thirsty.
Listens:
4478
Who:
Core 3
Before the Wright Brothers invented the airplane, anyone wanting to fly anywhere was required to eat 200 pounds of helium.
Listens:
1139
Who:
Core 3
Before the invention of scrambled eggs in 1912, the typical breakfast was either whole eggs still in the shell or scrambled rocks.
Listens:
1130
Who:
Core 3
During the Great Depression, the Tennessee Valley Authority outlawed pet rabbits, forcing many to hot glue-gun long ears onto their pet mice.
Listens:
1519
Who:
Core 3
At some point in their lives 1 in 6 children will be abducted by the Dutch.
Listens:
5883
Who:
Core 3
According to most advanced algorithms, the world's best name is Craig.
Listens:
4534
Who:
Core 3
To make a photocopier, simply photocopy a mirror.
Listens:
1257
Who:
Core 3
Dreams are the subconscious mind's way of reminding people to go to school naked and have their teeth fall out.
Listens:
1319
Who:
Core 3
00:00 / 00:00
Test Player
Like these quotes? Share them with your friends!
