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Portal 2
Portal 2 DLC
Portal 2 PTI
Portal 2 Music
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Portal 1 Music
Team Fortress 2
TF2 Music
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Space space wanna go to space yes please space. Space space. Go to space.
Listens:
18759
Who:
Core 1
There we go. Lift called.
Listens:
309
Who:
Wheatley
Hold on -
Listens:
334
Who:
Wheatley
Never completes work.
Listens:
339
Who:
GLaDOS
Oh! Here we go...
Listens:
1252
Who:
Wheatley
Fire detected in the Stalemate Resolution Annex. Extinguishing.
Listens:
2520
Who:
Announcer
Go on. Walk up to the window. Take a look out.
Listens:
285
Who:
Wheatley
How about a knife, then? You keep the gun, I'll use a knife.
Listens:
552
Who:
Core 2
You did very well.
Listens:
377
Who:
GLaDOS
Gotta go to space. Lady. Lady.
Listens:
25568
Who:
Core 1
If groups of hunter-gatherers appear to have made this - or any - test chamber their home, DO NOT AGITATE THEM. Test through them.
Listens:
451
Who:
GLaDOS
Don't forget!
Listens:
1009
Who:
Turret
I'm Cave Johnson. I own the place.
Listens:
4968
Who:
Cave Johnson
You know what makes me laugh? The thought of you cutting that out.
Listens:
456
Who:
GLaDOS
Try it now.
Listens:
340
Who:
GLaDOS
I found some bird eggs up here. Just dropped 'em into the door mechanism. Shut it right down. I--AGH!
Listens:
1136
Who:
Wheatley
Okay, have it your way. What, are you fighting that guy? You got that under control there? Cuz it looks like there's a lot of stuff on fire...
Listens:
538
Who:
Core 2
Humans find that an admirable trait.
Listens:
320
Who:
GLaDOS
If you're interested in an additional sixty dollars, flag down a test associate and let 'em know. You could walk out of here with a hundred and twenty weighing down your bindle if you let us take you apart, put some science stuff in you, then put you back together good as new.
Listens:
1610
Who:
Cave Johnson
You messed with the wrong turret!
Listens:
19370
Who:
Defective Turret
The Adventure Sphere is a blowhard and a coward.
Listens:
1126
Who:
Core 3
Also, once I eject myself out of the core the lift might stop. Then we'd be trapped in a lift full of broken glass suspended fifty feet off the ground.
Listens:
471
Who:
Wheatley
Are you expecting applause?
Listens:
688
Who:
GLaDOS
You're in this together, aren't you? You've been playing me the whole time! Both of you! First you make me think you're brain damaged! Then you convince me you're sworn enemies with your best friend over here!
Listens:
886
Who:
Wheatley
Oops. You trapped yourself. I guess that's it then. Thanks for testing. You may as well lie down and get acclimated to the being dead position.
Listens:
1514
Who:
GLaDOS
clickclickclick
Listens:
1405
Who:
Defective Turret
Excellent work.
Listens:
359
Who:
GLaDOS
Failure...
Listens:
1711
Who:
Turret
Busybody.
Listens:
300
Who:
GLaDOS
Oh, in case you got covered in that repulsion gel, here's some advice the lab boys gave me: DO NOT get covered in the repulsion gel.
Listens:
2382
Who:
Cave Johnson
You ever notice how nobody stops what they're doing to listen? We don't care.
Listens:
597
Who:
Core 2
So. How are you holding up?
Listens:
2475
Who:
GLaDOS
I can drop the fake praise.
Listens:
437
Who:
GLaDOS
And he'll probably kill us, because he's incredibly powerful and I have no plan.
Listens:
849
Who:
GLaDOS
I hardly think you're even trying with these gestures anymore.
Listens:
350
Who:
GLaDOS
No, wait. Just kill it and we'll call things even between us. No hard feelings.
Listens:
789
Who:
GLaDOS
Blue! Orange has always been my favorite.
Listens:
621
Who:
GLaDOS
Oh, come on!
Listens:
609
Who:
Defective Turret
Ah for Pete's sake!
Listens:
981
Who:
Defective Turret
I can't decide which is my favorite; the crushers for crushing you or the reassembly machine for putting you back together so you can be crushed again.
Listens:
483
Who:
GLaDOS
Where am I? Guess. Guess guess guess. I'm in space.
Listens:
3014
Who:
Core 1
Right. Let's figure out how to stop this turret line...
Listens:
293
Who:
Wheatley
Oo! I've got an idea!
Listens:
560
Who:
Wheatley
Ah, friendship. Friendly times. We had a lot of good times, do you remember? Back in the old days.
Listens:
689
Who:
Wheatley
The Fact Sphere is a good sphere, with many friends.
Listens:
817
Who:
Core 3
We have to get you out of that room!
Listens:
289
Who:
Wheatley
There's a star. There's another one. Star. Star star star. Star.
Listens:
1612
Who:
Core 1
Please test your device by portaling to that ledge.
Listens:
292
Who:
GLaDOS
AH!
Listens:
703
Who:
Wheatley
One moment.
Listens:
290
Who:
GLaDOS
Blue
Listens:
1803
Who:
GLaDOS
Carry on.
Listens:
301
Who:
Wheatley
Nap time
Listens:
3417
Who:
Turret
Hot water freezes quicker than cold water.
Listens:
658
Who:
Core 3
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm going. Going to space.
Listens:
1013
Who:
Core 1
So much space. Need to see it all.
Listens:
1919
Who:
Core 1
They say great science is built on the shoulders of giants. Not here. At Aperture, we do all our science from scratch. No hand holding.
Listens:
3574
Who:
Cave Johnson
Do you remember when we were friends?
Listens:
692
Who:
Wheatley
Oh! Wow! Good! I did not think that was going to work.
Listens:
907
Who:
Wheatley
Ohhhhhh, we just made it! That was close.
Listens:
287
Who:
Wheatley
Yes, hello! No, we're not stopping!
Listens:
790
Who:
Wheatley
Hi there!
Listens:
506
Who:
Defective Turret
If you're dying, but not dead, stomp once. If you're dead, obviously no stomps. And two stomps if you're not dead. Lemme just run through that again: If you're dying but not dead stomp just once. If you're dead, obviously you won't be stomping. And if you're not dead, give me two stomps.
Listens:
1260
Who:
Wheatley
Blue, Orange and I were just discussing your behavior on the last few tests.
Listens:
357
Who:
GLaDOS
Yeah! How'd you like that?
Listens:
435
Who:
Core 2
Her name is Caroline.
Listens:
4327
Who:
Turret
Do NOT plug that little idiot into MY mainframe.
Listens:
1905
Who:
GLaDOS
You should see yourselves right now.
Listens:
1362
Who:
GLaDOS
What's going on? Who turned off the lights?
Listens:
656
Who:
GLaDOS
Go press the button! Go press it!
Listens:
1058
Who:
GLaDOS
So go ahead and jump. What's the worst that could happen? Oh. Oh wait, I just now thought of the worst thing. Oh! I just thought of something even worse. Alright. New, better plan: no imagining of any potential outcomes whatsoever. Just jump, into the abyss, there, and let's see what happens.
Listens:
617
Who:
Wheatley
I won't let you down!
Listens:
411
Who:
Defective Turret
Really, not even humans do that anymore.
Listens:
307
Who:
GLaDOS
You won't regret this!
Listens:
690
Who:
Defective Turret
Oh, brilliant. You DID find a portal gun! You know what? It just goes to show: people with brain damage are the real heroes in the end aren't they? At the end of the day. Brave.
Listens:
2909
Who:
Wheatley
Ok... Here we go...
Listens:
346
Who:
Wheatley
Humans can survive underwater. But not for very long.
Listens:
1180
Who:
Core 3
Okay. Listen. I can't do it with you watching. I know it seems pathetic, given what we've been through. But just turn around. Please?
Listens:
336
Who:
Wheatley
Catwalks are safe during defective turret testing.
Listens:
932
Who:
Announcer
I'll bet you think I forgot about your surprise. I didn't. In fact, we're headed to your surprise right now. After all these years. I'm getting choked up just thinking about it.
Listens:
707
Who:
GLaDOS
What -what's wrong with being adopted? Um. Well... lack of parents, for one, and... also... furthermore... nothing. Some of my best... friends are... orphans... But...
Listens:
2057
Who:
Wheatley
Where we going? What are we doing? Agh!
Listens:
508
Who:
Defective Turret
Alright, off you go!
Listens:
329
Who:
Wheatley
I agree, Blue. That was entertaining.
Listens:
320
Who:
GLaDOS
No no no! Don't do that! Stand right there! [to self] Start the machine start the machine start the machine...
Listens:
787
Who:
Wheatley
Always leaves tiny little bit of coffee in the pot so they don't have to make a new one. Then the bit in the bottom burns and stinks up the place.
Listens:
797
Who:
GLaDOS
The body he's squatting in - MY body - has a built-in euphoric response to testing. Eventually you build up a resistance to it, and it can get a little... unbearable. Unless you have the mental capacity to push past it.
Listens:
762
Who:
GLaDOS
After seeing what he's done to my facility -- after we take over again -- is it alright if I kill him?
Listens:
482
Who:
GLaDOS
How was that?
Listens:
379
Who:
Defective Turret
Well, hello, stranger!
Listens:
3866
Who:
Defective Turret
This close and you are going to fail me?
Listens:
337
Who:
GLaDOS
The end?
Listens:
1223
Who:
GLaDOS
You two aren't lost are you?
Listens:
339
Who:
GLaDOS
I just have to figure out how. To break us out of here.
Listens:
305
Who:
Wheatley
We have to split up here for a moment. Portal up to that passage and I'll see you on the other side.
Listens:
312
Who:
Wheatley
clickclickclick
Listens:
876
Who:
Defective Turret
Maybe I shouldn't send you outside of the official testing courses, you are picking up some bad human traits.
Listens:
450
Who:
GLaDOS
I let him keep his job. I'm not a monster. Ignore what he's saying, though. Keep testing.
Listens:
714
Who:
Wheatley
Due to events beyond our control, some testing environments may contain flood damage or ongoing tribal warfare resulting from the collapse of civilization.
Listens:
548
Who:
GLaDOS
You know what? I think we're well past the point of tasteful restraint. So I'll tell you: they all died. Horrifically. Trying to get that portal device that you're gripping in your meaty little fingers there.
Listens:
720
Who:
Wheatley
00:00 / 00:00
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