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Portal 2
Portal 2 DLC
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Portal 1 Music
Team Fortress 2
TF2 Music
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Go press the button! Go press it!
Listens:
1074
Who:
GLaDOS
Hey lady.
Listens:
1073
Who:
Core 1
I don't want to drive a wedge between the two of you, but I've been studying Blue's performance, and I don't know how to put this... I'm certain you're trying very hard.
Listens:
1070
Who:
GLaDOS
Hello again, did you know these are the only set of tests available to you... you are going to need to select them again.
Listens:
1070
Who:
GLaDOS
What's a guy gotta do to get some bullets around here?
Listens:
1068
Who:
Defective Turret
Hey lady. Lady.
Listens:
1067
Who:
Core 1
Oh! Yes. Well done.
Listens:
1067
Who:
Wheatley
Yes. Please. Space.
Listens:
1066
Who:
Core 1
Which involves deadly lasers and how test subjects react when locked in a room with deadly lasers.
Listens:
1066
Who:
GLaDOS
Space. Space. Gonna go to space.
Listens:
1065
Who:
Core 1
Really? Okay.
Listens:
1064
Who:
GLaDOS
Your business is appreciated
Listens:
1060
Who:
Turret
Those of you helping us test the repulsion gel today, just follow the blue line on the floor.
Listens:
1058
Who:
Cave Johnson
One: No portal surfaces.
Listens:
1058
Who:
Wheatley
Spheres that insist on going into space are inferior to spheres that don't.
Listens:
1057
Who:
Core 3
I love space. Love space.
Listens:
1054
Who:
Core 1
'Lair' - heh, weird isn't it? First time I've said it out loud. Sounds a bit ridiculous, really. But I can assure you it is one. A proper lair. Deadly lair.
Listens:
1054
Who:
Wheatley
Hey.
Listens:
1053
Who:
Core 1
Yes, I see you waving.
Listens:
1053
Who:
GLaDOS
Because of the technical difficulties we are currently experiencing, your test environment is unsupervised.
Listens:
1050
Who:
Announcer
Are we in space?
Listens:
1050
Who:
Core 1
Space.
Listens:
1049
Who:
Core 1
Space.
Listens:
1047
Who:
Core 1
I love space.
Listens:
1047
Who:
Core 1
[out of breath] Okay. That's probably the bird, isn't it? That laid the eggs! Livid!
Listens:
1047
Who:
Wheatley
Oh! Oh oh! Yes. Alright. Just had a brainwave. I'll be back. If you're still alive. I'll be back. Don't die until I get back.
Listens:
1046
Who:
Wheatley
Let's go - let's go to space. Let's go to space.
Listens:
1045
Who:
Core 1
Love space. Need to go to space.
Listens:
1045
Who:
Core 1
He will most likely kill you, violently.
Listens:
1045
Who:
Core 3
Avocados have the highest fiber and calories of any fruit. They are found in Australians.
Listens:
1045
Who:
Core 3
I made it all up.
Listens:
1044
Who:
GLaDOS
As an impartial collaboration facilitator, it would be unfair of me to name my favorite member of your team. However, it’s perfectly fair to hint at it in a way that my least favorite member probably isn't smart enough to understand. Rhymeswithglue. Orange you are doing very well.
Listens:
1042
Who:
GLaDOS
The Enrichment Center will now provide a list of numbers and fruits. Write them down as they will become important later in the experiment. Not the fruits, though. Seven. Avocado. Forty. Please continue into the next test chamber.
Listens:
1041
Who:
GLaDOS
Wanna go to space.
Listens:
1037
Who:
Core 1
I thought we fixed that.
Listens:
1036
Who:
Defective Turret
Going to space.
Listens:
1035
Who:
Core 1
Space space wanna go to space
Listens:
1034
Who:
Core 1
Oh well. We have warehouses FULL of the things. Absolutely worthless. I'm happy to get rid of them.
Listens:
1032
Who:
GLaDOS
I’m scared!
Listens:
1032
Who:
Turret
We're not gonna release this stuff into the wild until it's good and damn ready, so as long as you keep yourself in top physical form, there'll always be a limo waiting for you.
Listens:
1030
Who:
Cave Johnson
Please go to space.
Listens:
1030
Who:
Core 1
Blah.
Listens:
1030
Who:
GLaDOS
Space wanna go wanna go to space wanna go to space
Listens:
1029
Who:
Core 1
'Yeah? Well this thorn... is about to take you down.' Man, that sounded a whole lot better in my head.
Listens:
1029
Who:
Core 2
For that Blue is penalized fifty science collaboration points.
Listens:
1028
Who:
GLaDOS
While I was out investigating, I found a fascinating new test element. It's never been used for human testing because, apparently, contact with it causes heart failure. The literature doesn't mention anything about lump-of-coal failure, though, so you should be fine.
Listens:
1028
Who:
GLaDOS
Hey.
Listens:
1027
Who:
Core 1
Wanna go to -- wanna go to space
Listens:
1026
Who:
Core 1
Well. I suppose we could just sit in this room and glare at each other until somebody drops dead, but I have a better idea.
Listens:
1025
Who:
GLaDOS
Luckily I'm a bigger person than that. I'm happy to put this all behind us and get back to work. After all, we've got a lot to do, and only sixty more years to do it. More or less. I don't have the actuarial tables in front of me.
Listens:
1025
Who:
GLaDOS
The testing area's just up ahead. The quicker you get through, the quicker you'll get your sixty bucks.
Listens:
1023
Who:
Cave Johnson
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm going. Going to space.
Listens:
1023
Who:
Core 1
Rats cannot throw up.
Listens:
1022
Who:
Core 3
Don't forget!
Listens:
1022
Who:
Turret
Ow!
Listens:
1020
Who:
Turret
Your test assignment will vary, depending on the manner in which you have bent the world to your will.
Listens:
1019
Who:
Cave Johnson
If you had any belongings, please pick them up now. We don't want old newspapers and sticks cluttering up the building.
Listens:
1019
Who:
Cave Johnson
Ohhh! Are you having a laugh?
Listens:
1016
Who:
Wheatley
Put me in the game, coach!
Listens:
1016
Who:
Defective Turret
Hello!
Listens:
1014
Who:
Wheatley
clickclickclick
Listens:
1014
Who:
Defective Turret
Gonna be in space.
Listens:
1008
Who:
Core 1
Space.
Listens:
1007
Who:
Core 1
Three: Bomb-proof shields for me. Leading directly into number Four: Bombs. For throwing at you.
Listens:
1006
Who:
Wheatley
You have just passed through an Aperture Science Material Emancipation Grill, which vaporizes most Aperture Science equipment that touches it.
Listens:
1005
Who:
Announcer
Wanna go to space. Space.
Listens:
1005
Who:
Core 1
I'm going to space.
Listens:
1005
Who:
Core 1
I'm not going to lie to you, the odds are a million to one. And that's with some generous rounding.
Listens:
1004
Who:
GLaDOS
Owwww!
Listens:
1004
Who:
Turret
Oh, remember the time I took over the facility? Greatest moment of my life, but you just wanted to leave. Didn't want to share in my success. Well, so you know, I'd be happy for you if you succeeded. Apart from right now, obviously.
Listens:
1003
Who:
Wheatley
Okay, DON'T PANIC! I can still stop it, not a problem. There's a password! I'll just hack it. Here we go.
Listens:
999
Who:
Wheatley
This course was created and then abandoned by humans. They tend to do that, create something wonderful and then abandon it.
Listens:
997
Who:
GLaDOS
Nice catch, Orange.
Listens:
996
Who:
GLaDOS
Oh, this is ridiculous!
Listens:
995
Who:
Defective Turret
This is a sterile environment; please refrain from riding on the turret line.
Listens:
994
Who:
Announcer
Horrible people skills.
Listens:
994
Who:
GLaDOS
Two: Start the neurotoxin immediately.
Listens:
994
Who:
Wheatley
Back again!
Listens:
994
Who:
Defective Turret
Here, let me put on some adventure music.
Listens:
993
Who:
Core 2
Ah for Pete's sake!
Listens:
989
Who:
Defective Turret
Anyway. Just finished the last one. The hardest one. Machiavelli. Do not know what all the fuss was about. Understood it perfectly. Have you read that one?
Listens:
988
Who:
Wheatley
Ah. I tell ya. Humans. Love 'em. Just... The way they look is great. And their... folklore. Wonderful isn't it? Very colorful...
Listens:
987
Who:
Wheatley
They're not even your screens to break. It's vandalism. It's pure vandalism. You wouldn't do this if this was your house, would you? If I came around to your house smashin' your telly to bits, you'd be furious. And rightly so. Unbelievable.
Listens:
986
Who:
Wheatley
Hey! Squeaky-voice! How'd I do?
Listens:
986
Who:
Defective Turret
Defective Turret testing active.
Listens:
985
Who:
Announcer
Don't press it! COME BACK!
Listens:
985
Who:
Wheatley
Put me down!
Listens:
985
Who:
Turret
Hold on. Those are raccoons. Homo sapiens only, please.
Listens:
984
Who:
GLaDOS
Please do not engage with turrets heading towards redemption.
Listens:
982
Who:
Announcer
ONE Catchmecatchmecatchmecatchmecatchme
Listens:
982
Who:
Wheatley
I talked my way onto the nanobot work crew rebuilding this shaft. They're REALLY small, so they have very tiny little brains. But there're a billion of 'em, so it's only a matter of time until ONE of them notices I'm the size of a planet.
Listens:
981
Who:
Wheatley
Hello.
Listens:
979
Who:
Wheatley
Thank you for completing the testing courses. If you enjoyed your experience, you may now re-enter the testing course of your choice.
Listens:
978
Who:
Announcer
Please avoid alerting active turrets or being shot by active turrets.
Listens:
978
Who:
Announcer
Owww!
Listens:
978
Who:
Turret
Uhoh
Listens:
977
Who:
Turret
Good. You made it to one of the human habitats. We're looking for an artifact. Think of it as an archeological dig.
Listens:
976
Who:
GLaDOS
The first commercial airline flight took to the air in 1914. Everyone involved screamed the entire way.
Listens:
975
Who:
Core 3
What? No, you pressed that bAGGGHHHHHH
Listens:
975
Who:
Wheatley
Take me with you...
Listens:
975
Who:
Turret
00:00 / 00:00
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