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Portal 2
Portal 2 DLC
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Portal 1 Music
Team Fortress 2
TF2 Music
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Random
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Hey lady.
Listens:
1070
Who:
Core 1
Go press the button! Go press it!
Listens:
1069
Who:
GLaDOS
What's a guy gotta do to get some bullets around here?
Listens:
1067
Who:
Defective Turret
Space. Space. Gonna go to space.
Listens:
1065
Who:
Core 1
Hey lady. Lady.
Listens:
1065
Who:
Core 1
Hello again, did you know these are the only set of tests available to you... you are going to need to select them again.
Listens:
1065
Who:
GLaDOS
Yes. Please. Space.
Listens:
1064
Who:
Core 1
Really? Okay.
Listens:
1063
Who:
GLaDOS
Oh! Yes. Well done.
Listens:
1061
Who:
Wheatley
I don't want to drive a wedge between the two of you, but I've been studying Blue's performance, and I don't know how to put this... I'm certain you're trying very hard.
Listens:
1059
Who:
GLaDOS
Which involves deadly lasers and how test subjects react when locked in a room with deadly lasers.
Listens:
1059
Who:
GLaDOS
Your business is appreciated
Listens:
1059
Who:
Turret
Those of you helping us test the repulsion gel today, just follow the blue line on the floor.
Listens:
1056
Who:
Cave Johnson
Spheres that insist on going into space are inferior to spheres that don't.
Listens:
1056
Who:
Core 3
One: No portal surfaces.
Listens:
1055
Who:
Wheatley
I love space. Love space.
Listens:
1052
Who:
Core 1
Yes, I see you waving.
Listens:
1051
Who:
GLaDOS
Hey.
Listens:
1050
Who:
Core 1
Because of the technical difficulties we are currently experiencing, your test environment is unsupervised.
Listens:
1049
Who:
Announcer
Are we in space?
Listens:
1048
Who:
Core 1
'Lair' - heh, weird isn't it? First time I've said it out loud. Sounds a bit ridiculous, really. But I can assure you it is one. A proper lair. Deadly lair.
Listens:
1047
Who:
Wheatley
I love space.
Listens:
1046
Who:
Core 1
Space.
Listens:
1046
Who:
Core 1
He will most likely kill you, violently.
Listens:
1045
Who:
Core 3
Avocados have the highest fiber and calories of any fruit. They are found in Australians.
Listens:
1045
Who:
Core 3
Let's go - let's go to space. Let's go to space.
Listens:
1043
Who:
Core 1
Love space. Need to go to space.
Listens:
1043
Who:
Core 1
[out of breath] Okay. That's probably the bird, isn't it? That laid the eggs! Livid!
Listens:
1043
Who:
Wheatley
Space.
Listens:
1042
Who:
Core 1
As an impartial collaboration facilitator, it would be unfair of me to name my favorite member of your team. However, it’s perfectly fair to hint at it in a way that my least favorite member probably isn't smart enough to understand. Rhymeswithglue. Orange you are doing very well.
Listens:
1042
Who:
GLaDOS
Oh! Oh oh! Yes. Alright. Just had a brainwave. I'll be back. If you're still alive. I'll be back. Don't die until I get back.
Listens:
1042
Who:
Wheatley
The Enrichment Center will now provide a list of numbers and fruits. Write them down as they will become important later in the experiment. Not the fruits, though. Seven. Avocado. Forty. Please continue into the next test chamber.
Listens:
1040
Who:
GLaDOS
I made it all up.
Listens:
1040
Who:
GLaDOS
Space space wanna go to space
Listens:
1034
Who:
Core 1
Wanna go to space.
Listens:
1034
Who:
Core 1
I thought we fixed that.
Listens:
1034
Who:
Defective Turret
Going to space.
Listens:
1033
Who:
Core 1
We're not gonna release this stuff into the wild until it's good and damn ready, so as long as you keep yourself in top physical form, there'll always be a limo waiting for you.
Listens:
1028
Who:
Cave Johnson
Space wanna go wanna go to space wanna go to space
Listens:
1028
Who:
Core 1
Please go to space.
Listens:
1028
Who:
Core 1
Blah.
Listens:
1027
Who:
GLaDOS
Wanna go to -- wanna go to space
Listens:
1025
Who:
Core 1
While I was out investigating, I found a fascinating new test element. It's never been used for human testing because, apparently, contact with it causes heart failure. The literature doesn't mention anything about lump-of-coal failure, though, so you should be fine.
Listens:
1025
Who:
GLaDOS
Hey.
Listens:
1024
Who:
Core 1
'Yeah? Well this thorn... is about to take you down.' Man, that sounded a whole lot better in my head.
Listens:
1024
Who:
Core 2
Well. I suppose we could just sit in this room and glare at each other until somebody drops dead, but I have a better idea.
Listens:
1024
Who:
GLaDOS
For that Blue is penalized fifty science collaboration points.
Listens:
1022
Who:
GLaDOS
Rats cannot throw up.
Listens:
1021
Who:
Core 3
The testing area's just up ahead. The quicker you get through, the quicker you'll get your sixty bucks.
Listens:
1020
Who:
Cave Johnson
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm going. Going to space.
Listens:
1020
Who:
Core 1
Oh well. We have warehouses FULL of the things. Absolutely worthless. I'm happy to get rid of them.
Listens:
1019
Who:
GLaDOS
Don't forget!
Listens:
1019
Who:
Turret
Your test assignment will vary, depending on the manner in which you have bent the world to your will.
Listens:
1018
Who:
Cave Johnson
Ow!
Listens:
1018
Who:
Turret
If you had any belongings, please pick them up now. We don't want old newspapers and sticks cluttering up the building.
Listens:
1017
Who:
Cave Johnson
Luckily I'm a bigger person than that. I'm happy to put this all behind us and get back to work. After all, we've got a lot to do, and only sixty more years to do it. More or less. I don't have the actuarial tables in front of me.
Listens:
1017
Who:
GLaDOS
Ohhh! Are you having a laugh?
Listens:
1016
Who:
Wheatley
Put me in the game, coach!
Listens:
1013
Who:
Defective Turret
clickclickclick
Listens:
1012
Who:
Defective Turret
Hello!
Listens:
1010
Who:
Wheatley
You have just passed through an Aperture Science Material Emancipation Grill, which vaporizes most Aperture Science equipment that touches it.
Listens:
1005
Who:
Announcer
Gonna be in space.
Listens:
1005
Who:
Core 1
I'm going to space.
Listens:
1004
Who:
Core 1
Space.
Listens:
1003
Who:
Core 1
Owwww!
Listens:
1003
Who:
Turret
Wanna go to space. Space.
Listens:
1002
Who:
Core 1
Oh, remember the time I took over the facility? Greatest moment of my life, but you just wanted to leave. Didn't want to share in my success. Well, so you know, I'd be happy for you if you succeeded. Apart from right now, obviously.
Listens:
1002
Who:
Wheatley
Three: Bomb-proof shields for me. Leading directly into number Four: Bombs. For throwing at you.
Listens:
1000
Who:
Wheatley
Okay, DON'T PANIC! I can still stop it, not a problem. There's a password! I'll just hack it. Here we go.
Listens:
999
Who:
Wheatley
I'm not going to lie to you, the odds are a million to one. And that's with some generous rounding.
Listens:
997
Who:
GLaDOS
Nice catch, Orange.
Listens:
995
Who:
GLaDOS
This course was created and then abandoned by humans. They tend to do that, create something wonderful and then abandon it.
Listens:
994
Who:
GLaDOS
Two: Start the neurotoxin immediately.
Listens:
993
Who:
Wheatley
Oh, this is ridiculous!
Listens:
992
Who:
Defective Turret
Horrible people skills.
Listens:
991
Who:
GLaDOS
This is a sterile environment; please refrain from riding on the turret line.
Listens:
990
Who:
Announcer
Back again!
Listens:
990
Who:
Defective Turret
Here, let me put on some adventure music.
Listens:
987
Who:
Core 2
Ah for Pete's sake!
Listens:
986
Who:
Defective Turret
Anyway. Just finished the last one. The hardest one. Machiavelli. Do not know what all the fuss was about. Understood it perfectly. Have you read that one?
Listens:
985
Who:
Wheatley
Put me down!
Listens:
984
Who:
Turret
Defective Turret testing active.
Listens:
982
Who:
Announcer
Don't press it! COME BACK!
Listens:
982
Who:
Wheatley
They're not even your screens to break. It's vandalism. It's pure vandalism. You wouldn't do this if this was your house, would you? If I came around to your house smashin' your telly to bits, you'd be furious. And rightly so. Unbelievable.
Listens:
982
Who:
Wheatley
Hold on. Those are raccoons. Homo sapiens only, please.
Listens:
981
Who:
GLaDOS
ONE Catchmecatchmecatchmecatchmecatchme
Listens:
980
Who:
Wheatley
Please do not engage with turrets heading towards redemption.
Listens:
979
Who:
Announcer
I talked my way onto the nanobot work crew rebuilding this shaft. They're REALLY small, so they have very tiny little brains. But there're a billion of 'em, so it's only a matter of time until ONE of them notices I'm the size of a planet.
Listens:
979
Who:
Wheatley
I’m scared!
Listens:
979
Who:
Turret
Ah. I tell ya. Humans. Love 'em. Just... The way they look is great. And their... folklore. Wonderful isn't it? Very colorful...
Listens:
978
Who:
Wheatley
Hey! Squeaky-voice! How'd I do?
Listens:
977
Who:
Defective Turret
Please avoid alerting active turrets or being shot by active turrets.
Listens:
976
Who:
Announcer
Good. You made it to one of the human habitats. We're looking for an artifact. Think of it as an archeological dig.
Listens:
976
Who:
GLaDOS
Thank you for completing the testing courses. If you enjoyed your experience, you may now re-enter the testing course of your choice.
Listens:
975
Who:
Announcer
Take me with you...
Listens:
975
Who:
Turret
Uhoh
Listens:
975
Who:
Turret
The first commercial airline flight took to the air in 1914. Everyone involved screamed the entire way.
Listens:
972
Who:
Core 3
What? No, you pressed that bAGGGHHHHHH
Listens:
972
Who:
Wheatley
Hey
Listens:
970
Who:
Turret
'Skeletons.' Right, I guess I DID stockpile some tests.
Listens:
969
Who:
GLaDOS
00:00 / 00:00
Test Player
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