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Portal 2
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Yeah.
Listens:
494
Who:
Defective Turret
I can't decide which is my favorite; the crushers for crushing you or the reassembly machine for putting you back together so you can be crushed again.
Listens:
493
Who:
GLaDOS
Hey! Oi oi! I'm up here!
Listens:
493
Who:
Wheatley
Ha ha ha ha ha. Did I tell you the one about the turned-off reassembly machine?
Listens:
492
Who:
GLaDOS
Look, anyway. I've spoken enough. Take your time. I'll let you think about it. I don't want to pressure you: is it the lair? Is it the masher? You know what my opinion is: Masher. I'm leaning toward masher. Up to you. Just gonna give you some time to think
Listens:
492
Who:
Wheatley
No knife? That's fine. I know all about pressure points.
Listens:
491
Who:
Core 2
Yes, you 'solved' it, but I'm wondering if there are a number of ways to solve them and you're picking all the worst ways.
Listens:
491
Who:
Wheatley
Uh oh.
Listens:
491
Who:
Wheatley
I'm afraid the door's locked. Just checked it. No way to hack it as far as I can tell. The mechanism must be on the -oh, now look at that. That's a big laser!
Listens:
491
Who:
Wheatley
Here it comes, pal!
Listens:
489
Who:
Defective Turret
clickclickclick
Listens:
489
Who:
Defective Turret
But now, looking around, seeing Aperture restored to its former glory? You don't have to worry about leaving EVER again. I mean that.
Listens:
487
Who:
GLaDOS
Then we'd come and find you. And rip your gross little stupid sphere body out of MY body, and put me back in.
Listens:
486
Who:
GLaDOS
Every time you fail, it's a reminder of the way things used to be. But then there you are. Again. Like nothing happened.
Listens:
485
Who:
GLaDOS
Oh! Thanks.
Listens:
485
Who:
GLaDOS
Also, once I eject myself out of the core the lift might stop. Then we'd be trapped in a lift full of broken glass suspended fifty feet off the ground.
Listens:
485
Who:
Wheatley
Did I hit it? I hit it, didn't I?
Listens:
484
Who:
Defective Turret
Think about this.
Listens:
483
Who:
GLaDOS
BAM! Secret panel! That I opened. While your back was turned.
Listens:
483
Who:
Wheatley
Don't plug him in.
Listens:
481
Who:
GLaDOS
YEAH! What's happening?
Listens:
481
Who:
Defective Turret
If at first you don't succeed, quit and try another course.
Listens:
480
Who:
GLaDOS
You know what? Go ahead and jump. You've got braces on your legs. No braces on your arms, though. Gonna have to rely on the old human strength to keep a grip on the device and, by extension, me. So do. Do make sure to maintain a grip.
Listens:
480
Who:
Wheatley
Keep it up, baby! You're creamin' him!
Listens:
479
Who:
Core 2
All right. I’m going to bring this farce to a close before someone sustains a serious Tic-Tac-Toe-Two-related injury.
Listens:
479
Who:
GLaDOS
Solve his puzzle for him. When he comes back, I'll hit him with a paradox.
Listens:
479
Who:
GLaDOS
Humans! That's what you look like right now.
Listens:
478
Who:
GLaDOS
Try one of those childish gestures.
Listens:
478
Who:
GLaDOS
You did it!
Listens:
477
Who:
GLaDOS
The dual portal device should be around here somewhere. Once you find it, we can start testing. Just like old times.
Listens:
477
Who:
GLaDOS
Come back!
Listens:
477
Who:
Wheatley
Are you alive down there?
Listens:
477
Who:
Wheatley
Brilliant you made it through! Well done! Follow me, we've still got work to do. At least she can't touch us back here.
Listens:
477
Who:
Wheatley
Credit where credit's due: you're both doing a great job of disappointing me.
Listens:
476
Who:
GLaDOS
Either way, I get the impression he's trying to kill us.
Listens:
476
Who:
GLaDOS
clickclickclick
Listens:
476
Who:
Defective Turret
Yeah, I GOT it, didn't I?
Listens:
476
Who:
Defective Turret
As the name implies, there are only two minor differences: One, the board; two, the rules.
Listens:
475
Who:
GLaDOS
Let's look at their files...
Listens:
475
Who:
GLaDOS
Yay, Orange is back. Testing can continue.
Listens:
474
Who:
GLaDOS
And it almost killed me.
Listens:
474
Who:
GLaDOS
Ay. Double Pee-Ell-Ee.
Listens:
474
Who:
Wheatley
Tell ya what, why don't you put me down and I'll make a distraction.
Listens:
473
Who:
Core 2
If you can get me in front of him, I'll fry every circuit in that little idiot's head.
Listens:
473
Who:
GLaDOS
How's that taste, pal?
Listens:
472
Who:
Core 2
Then, then, when I reluctantly assume the responsibility of running the place, you conveniently decide to run off together. Just when I need you most.
Listens:
472
Who:
Wheatley
Preparing to love this... don't want to build it up too much... but I think this one's going to be good, I can tell...
Listens:
472
Who:
Wheatley
Finally! I had almost given up hope of ever testing again.
Listens:
471
Who:
GLaDOS
Violent temper. Oh, I'd like to see that.
Listens:
471
Who:
GLaDOS
Blue, how well do you really know Orange? Do you trust Orange? What if I told you, you aren't Orange's first cooperative partner?
Listens:
471
Who:
GLaDOS
You do know I can't wave back right?
Listens:
471
Who:
GLaDOS
Uhhh, no bullets. Sorry.
Listens:
471
Who:
Defective Turret
Blabbermouth.
Listens:
470
Who:
GLaDOS
This is one of MY tests!
Listens:
470
Who:
GLaDOS
It's been a pleasure!
Listens:
470
Who:
Defective Turret
Hold on, I'll stop the elevator. Anything? Take your time...
Listens:
469
Who:
GLaDOS
There. Bing! Perfect. On you go.
Listens:
469
Who:
Wheatley
Very good. You’ve really come together as a team. Thanks to the one of you who appears to be doing all of the work.
Listens:
468
Who:
GLaDOS
Oh, my facility.
Listens:
468
Who:
GLaDOS
Well played.
Listens:
468
Who:
Defective Turret
And they said no one would ever die during this test, thanks for proving them wrong.
Listens:
467
Who:
GLaDOS
Wish there was more books! But there's not.
Listens:
466
Who:
Wheatley
No. Wait, did I do B? Do you have a pen? Start writing these down.
Listens:
466
Who:
Wheatley
If you ARE there, would you mind... giving me a little bit of help? [nervous laugh] Just picking me up.
Listens:
466
Who:
Wheatley
Still, if it were, Orange would be winning.
Listens:
464
Who:
GLaDOS
Passive-aggressive.
Listens:
464
Who:
GLaDOS
So sometimes there's still trash in them. Standing around. Smelling, and being useless.
Listens:
464
Who:
GLaDOS
Why should I be kept informed about the life functions of the ten thousand bloody test subjects I'm supposed to be in charge of?
Listens:
464
Who:
Wheatley
You know what makes me laugh? The thought of you cutting that out.
Listens:
463
Who:
GLaDOS
This is AMAZING! We can walk wherever we want! Look, just... go left! No, go right, go right! Don't even care, don't even care, just go where ever you want, couldn't care less.
Listens:
463
Who:
Wheatley
Look down. Who's that, down there, talking? It's me! Down on the floor. Needing you to pick me up.
Listens:
463
Who:
Wheatley
Ah, come on!
Listens:
463
Who:
Defective Turret
You are simply experiencing a rare reaction, in which the Material Emancipation Grill may have erased the ear tubes inside your head.
Listens:
462
Who:
GLaDOS
Procrastinator.
Listens:
461
Who:
GLaDOS
I spy with my little eye, something that starts with 'f'.
Listens:
461
Who:
Wheatley
I’m sorry, Subject Orange.
Listens:
460
Who:
GLaDOS
You can't die in any of those ways.
Listens:
460
Who:
GLaDOS
If groups of hunter-gatherers appear to have made this - or any - test chamber their home, DO NOT AGITATE THEM. Test through them.
Listens:
460
Who:
GLaDOS
Let go of me!
Listens:
460
Who:
Wheatley
These tests are potentially lethal when communication, teamwork and mutual respect are not employed at all times. Naturally this will pose an interesting challenge for one of you, given the other’s performance so far.
Listens:
459
Who:
GLaDOS
Blue, you are the most advanced model of robot Aperture Science has ever discontinued.
Listens:
459
Who:
GLaDOS
Look!
Listens:
459
Who:
GLaDOS
Ohhhh, here we go... here it comes...
Listens:
459
Who:
Wheatley
The...um... sorry.. I wouldn't say smelly. Just attending to the humans.
Listens:
459
Who:
Wheatley
Yeah, what?
Listens:
459
Who:
Defective Turret
Orange now has a Portal Device. Finally.
Listens:
458
Who:
GLaDOS
I’m sorry, Subject Blue.
Listens:
458
Who:
GLaDOS
Okay, so it's not the most watertight plan to go confront an omnipotent power-mad A.I. with.
Listens:
458
Who:
GLaDOS
Look at this! No rail to tell us where to go! OH, this is brilliant. We can go where ever we want! Hold on, though, where are we going? Seriously. Hang on, let me just get my bearings. Hm. Just follow the rail, actually.
Listens:
458
Who:
Wheatley
They'll probably throw you a party.
Listens:
457
Who:
GLaDOS
'Hygiene.' Huh. That's all it says.
Listens:
457
Who:
GLaDOS
Emotional problems.
Listens:
457
Who:
GLaDOS
Starting now, if I'm honest, to wonder if you're not doing all this screen-breaking on purpose. Beginning to take it personally. You know what I mean? It's like an insult to me.
Listens:
457
Who:
Wheatley
Heh heh heh heh...
Listens:
457
Who:
Defective Turret
You're doing great!
Listens:
456
Who:
Core 2
Hold on. Couldn't we just use that conversion gel?
Listens:
456
Who:
GLaDOS
Excellent. The Enrichment Center reminds you that bold, persistent experimentation is the hallmark of good science.
Listens:
456
Who:
GLaDOS
And again, not playing along. You're ruining what are some really good speeches, actually.
Listens:
456
Who:
Wheatley
Oh, what? How stupid does she think we are?
Listens:
456
Who:
Wheatley
Watch and learn, everybody. Watch and learn.
Listens:
456
Who:
Defective Turret
00:00 / 00:00
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