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Portal 2
Portal 2 DLC
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Portal 1 Music
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TF2 Music
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Best of luck, lady!
Listens:
424
Who:
Defective Turret
Uhhh, no bullets. Sorry.
Listens:
424
Who:
Defective Turret
Watch and learn, everyone. Watch and learn.
Listens:
424
Who:
Defective Turret
You do know I can't wave back right?
Listens:
423
Who:
GLaDOS
clickclickclick
Listens:
423
Who:
Defective Turret
Welcome back to the hub, did you fail at selecting the correct course?
Listens:
422
Who:
GLaDOS
After seeing what he's done to my facility -- after we take over again -- is it alright if I kill him?
Listens:
422
Who:
GLaDOS
In order to ensure that sufficient power remains for core testing protocols, all safety devices have been disabled.
Listens:
422
Who:
GLaDOS
No knife? That's fine. I know all about pressure points.
Listens:
421
Who:
Core 2
Look at this! No rail to tell us where to go! OH, this is brilliant. We can go where ever we want! Hold on, though, where are we going? Seriously. Hang on, let me just get my bearings. Hm. Just follow the rail, actually.
Listens:
421
Who:
Wheatley
The...um... sorry.. I wouldn't say smelly. Just attending to the humans.
Listens:
421
Who:
Wheatley
Blue, how well do you really know Orange? Do you trust Orange? What if I told you, you aren't Orange's first cooperative partner?
Listens:
420
Who:
GLaDOS
Yeah.
Listens:
420
Who:
Defective Turret
Well, I did my best.
Listens:
420
Who:
Defective Turret
Good. You have a dual portal device. There should be a way back to the testing area up ahead.
Listens:
419
Who:
GLaDOS
The humans closed this test because they said it was too deadly. I thought they would have moved it into the testing track hall of fame for that, not let it deteriorate.
Listens:
418
Who:
GLaDOS
Uh oh.
Listens:
418
Who:
Wheatley
Yeah, alright.
Listens:
418
Who:
Defective Turret
Heh heh heh heh...
Listens:
418
Who:
Defective Turret
Did I hit it? I hit it, didn't I?
Listens:
418
Who:
Defective Turret
Heh heh heh heh...
Listens:
417
Who:
Defective Turret
How's that taste, pal?
Listens:
416
Who:
Core 2
You're doing great!
Listens:
416
Who:
Core 2
And they said no one would ever die during this test, thanks for proving them wrong.
Listens:
416
Who:
GLaDOS
This is just a thought experiment, just to see how much time you'll waste thinking about these worthless documents. The correct time is zero seconds.
Listens:
416
Who:
GLaDOS
Are you alive down there?
Listens:
416
Who:
Wheatley
It's been a pleasure!
Listens:
415
Who:
Defective Turret
Wish there was more books! But there's not.
Listens:
413
Who:
Wheatley
Nothing. He's good. This one. He is good. I'm gonna need to break out the expert level hacking maneuvers now. You asked for it Mate.
Listens:
413
Who:
Wheatley
YEAH! What's happening?
Listens:
413
Who:
Defective Turret
Tell ya what, why don't you put me down and I'll make a distraction.
Listens:
412
Who:
Core 2
Also, once I eject myself out of the core the lift might stop. Then we'd be trapped in a lift full of broken glass suspended fifty feet off the ground.
Listens:
412
Who:
Wheatley
I know we're in a lot of trouble and probably about to die.
Listens:
410
Who:
GLaDOS
You did it!
Listens:
409
Who:
GLaDOS
Oh.
Listens:
408
Who:
GLaDOS
These tests are potentially lethal when communication, teamwork and mutual respect are not employed at all times. Naturally this will pose an interesting challenge for one of you, given the other’s performance so far.
Listens:
407
Who:
GLaDOS
To get to the Vault, you are going to need to use all the tricks you have learned. To help, I have made these tests extremely difficult.
Listens:
407
Who:
GLaDOS
Oh, my facility.
Listens:
407
Who:
GLaDOS
Are you just saying that, or is it really going to hurt? You're just saying that aren't you? No, you're not. It is going to hurt, isn't it?
Listens:
407
Who:
Wheatley
As the name implies, there are only two minor differences: One, the board; two, the rules.
Listens:
406
Who:
GLaDOS
Congratulations. I am sure if I had the time to repair these tests, you would have never completed them. So again, congratulations on completing the broken easy tests.
Listens:
406
Who:
GLaDOS
You know, I'd tell you if I were dead. Courtesy. Mark of a civil society. So, just let me know.
Listens:
406
Who:
Wheatley
I spy with my little eye, something that starts with 'f'.
Listens:
406
Who:
Wheatley
Very good. You’ve really come together as a team. Thanks to the one of you who appears to be doing all of the work.
Listens:
405
Who:
GLaDOS
Try one of those childish gestures.
Listens:
405
Who:
GLaDOS
I can't decide which is my favorite; the crushers for crushing you or the reassembly machine for putting you back together so you can be crushed again.
Listens:
404
Who:
GLaDOS
You know what makes me laugh? The thought of you cutting that out.
Listens:
404
Who:
GLaDOS
All those pieces of the ceiling that keep falling out? Probably actually pieces of the ceiling, I'll bet. That looked real. But it doesn't signify anything, is my point.
Listens:
404
Who:
Wheatley
After you told me to turn the beam off, I thought I'd lost you. Went poking around for other test subjects. No luck there. Everyone's still all dead.
Listens:
404
Who:
Wheatley
You should both be familiar with the game of Tic-Tac-Toe.
Listens:
403
Who:
GLaDOS
Alright, stop moving.
Listens:
403
Who:
Wheatley
I'll give you a hint. Button. That's all I'm gonna say. One word. Button.
Listens:
403
Who:
Wheatley
Hey! Oi oi! I'm up here!
Listens:
403
Who:
Wheatley
Yeah, I GOT it, didn't I?
Listens:
403
Who:
Defective Turret
You can't die in any of those ways.
Listens:
402
Who:
GLaDOS
Hopeless. Just hopeless.
Listens:
402
Who:
GLaDOS
Let's look at their files...
Listens:
401
Who:
GLaDOS
I'm going to be honest with you now. Not fake honest like before, but real honest, like you're incapable of. I know you're up to something.
Listens:
401
Who:
GLaDOS
Well played.
Listens:
401
Who:
Defective Turret
ORANGE, please observe your partner's favorite animal.
Listens:
400
Who:
GLaDOS
But now, looking around, seeing Aperture restored to its former glory? You don't have to worry about leaving EVER again. I mean that.
Listens:
400
Who:
GLaDOS
Yes, you 'solved' it, but I'm wondering if there are a number of ways to solve them and you're picking all the worst ways.
Listens:
400
Who:
Wheatley
All right. You create a distraction then, and I'll distract him from YOUR distraction.
Listens:
399
Who:
Core 2
Yeah! How'd you like that?
Listens:
399
Who:
Core 2
Violent temper. Oh, I'd like to see that.
Listens:
399
Who:
GLaDOS
And it almost killed me.
Listens:
399
Who:
GLaDOS
If you have, in fact, not, you are encouraged to take a moment to reflect on your failure before proceeding into the next chamber.
Listens:
399
Who:
GLaDOS
Hold on, I'll stop the elevator. Anything? Take your time...
Listens:
399
Who:
GLaDOS
Do not do it!
Listens:
398
Who:
Wheatley
Do something only a human would do.
Listens:
397
Who:
GLaDOS
Then we'd come and find you. And rip your gross little stupid sphere body out of MY body, and put me back in.
Listens:
397
Who:
GLaDOS
Orange now has a Portal Device. Finally.
Listens:
396
Who:
GLaDOS
Blue, you are the most advanced model of robot Aperture Science has ever discontinued.
Listens:
396
Who:
GLaDOS
Hold on. Couldn't we just use that conversion gel?
Listens:
396
Who:
GLaDOS
Solve his puzzle for him. When he comes back, I'll hit him with a paradox.
Listens:
396
Who:
GLaDOS
And again, not playing along. You're ruining what are some really good speeches, actually.
Listens:
396
Who:
Wheatley
No!
Listens:
396
Who:
Wheatley
Plug me into that stick on the wall over there. I'll show you something.
Listens:
396
Who:
Wheatley
Heh heh heh...
Listens:
396
Who:
Defective Turret
Oh! Thanks.
Listens:
395
Who:
GLaDOS
Excellent. The Enrichment Center reminds you that bold, persistent experimentation is the hallmark of good science.
Listens:
395
Who:
GLaDOS
Okay!
Listens:
395
Who:
Defective Turret
I’ll just save the safety information about the dangerous experiment you’re about to do for AFTER the experiment.
Listens:
394
Who:
GLaDOS
I created this test to let the humans feel good about themselves. It is extremely easy. Just follow the arrows.
Listens:
394
Who:
GLaDOS
Look down. Who's that, down there, talking? It's me! Down on the floor. Needing you to pick me up.
Listens:
394
Who:
Wheatley
Look!
Listens:
393
Who:
GLaDOS
Uh oh.
Listens:
393
Who:
GLaDOS
Are you trying to impress me? What would impress me more is if you never did that again.
Listens:
393
Who:
GLaDOS
Let go!
Listens:
393
Who:
Wheatley
Oh, what? How stupid does she think we are?
Listens:
393
Who:
Wheatley
I’m sorry, Subject Blue.
Listens:
392
Who:
GLaDOS
Finally! I had almost given up hope of ever testing again.
Listens:
392
Who:
GLaDOS
Perfectionist. What's wrong with that?
Listens:
392
Who:
GLaDOS
Why should I be kept informed about the life functions of the ten thousand bloody test subjects I'm supposed to be in charge of?
Listens:
392
Who:
Wheatley
You know what? Go ahead and jump. You've got braces on your legs. No braces on your arms, though. Gonna have to rely on the old human strength to keep a grip on the device and, by extension, me. So do. Do make sure to maintain a grip.
Listens:
392
Who:
Wheatley
All right, you know what, it's gonna be best if you can get him to say something first. It's just better if I have a set-up.
Listens:
391
Who:
Core 2
Maybe I shouldn't send you outside of the official testing courses, you are picking up some bad human traits.
Listens:
391
Who:
GLaDOS
If the subject survived the test, we let them purchase the pictures for $5. If the subject died, we gave the photo to their next of kin free of charge.
Listens:
391
Who:
GLaDOS
Go on. Get a goooood lonnnnng look.
Listens:
391
Who:
GLaDOS
Ohhhh, here we go... here it comes...
Listens:
391
Who:
Wheatley
00:00 / 00:00
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