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Maybe I shouldn't send you outside of the official testing courses, you are picking up some bad human traits.
Listens:
455
Who:
GLaDOS
You're no longer bothering me. You're only hurting my impression of you.
Listens:
455
Who:
GLaDOS
I don't even know what I just said! But I can find out!
Listens:
455
Who:
Wheatley
Oh, BRILLIANT! That's brilliant!
Listens:
455
Who:
Wheatley
Best of luck, lady!
Listens:
455
Who:
Defective Turret
Oh.
Listens:
454
Who:
GLaDOS
Yes? Something you need?
Listens:
454
Who:
GLaDOS
All those pieces of the ceiling that keep falling out? Probably actually pieces of the ceiling, I'll bet. That looked real. But it doesn't signify anything, is my point.
Listens:
454
Who:
Wheatley
Done. I guess. I suppose. I wasn't paying attention.
Listens:
453
Who:
GLaDOS
Do something only a human would do.
Listens:
453
Who:
GLaDOS
Plug me into that stick on the wall over there. I'll show you something.
Listens:
453
Who:
Wheatley
We're running out of time...
Listens:
451
Who:
GLaDOS
I know we're in a lot of trouble and probably about to die.
Listens:
451
Who:
GLaDOS
Uh oh.
Listens:
450
Who:
GLaDOS
See that scanner out there? It's deciding which turrets to keep and which to toss. And it's using that MASTER turret as a template! If we pull out the template turret, it'll shut down the whole production line.
Listens:
450
Who:
Wheatley
Yeah, let's do this.
Listens:
450
Who:
Defective Turret
Notice the moat area. Very deadly. Extremely dangerous. Eventually. Not at the moment. Still working on it, still working on it.
Listens:
449
Who:
Wheatley
Yeah! How'd you like that?
Listens:
447
Who:
Core 2
How is this even science, without the consequence of death?
Listens:
447
Who:
GLaDOS
A somersault is just falling over in style. Congratulations on being clumsy.
Listens:
447
Who:
GLaDOS
OW!
Listens:
447
Who:
Wheatley
A...A...A...A...A... Umm... A.
Listens:
447
Who:
Wheatley
Sorry! Sorry. My fault.
Listens:
446
Who:
Wheatley
After you told me to turn the beam off, I thought I'd lost you. Went poking around for other test subjects. No luck there. Everyone's still all dead.
Listens:
446
Who:
Wheatley
Weighted Cubes calibrated.
Listens:
445
Who:
GLaDOS
To get to the Vault, you are going to need to use all the tricks you have learned. To help, I have made these tests extremely difficult.
Listens:
445
Who:
GLaDOS
Do you know why they abandoned this course? Too deadly.
Listens:
445
Who:
GLaDOS
Okay. Okay. Okay listen: New plan. Act natural act natural. We've done nothing wrong.
Listens:
445
Who:
Wheatley
You know, I'd tell you if I were dead. Courtesy. Mark of a civil society. So, just let me know.
Listens:
444
Who:
Wheatley
Stay casual when I tell you this: I think I smell neurotoxin.
Listens:
444
Who:
Wheatley
Go ahead and grab another one.
Listens:
443
Who:
GLaDOS
Cryptic.
Listens:
443
Who:
GLaDOS
Oh, sorry. I'm still cleaning out the test chambers.
Listens:
443
Who:
GLaDOS
Leave me in! Leave me in! Go press it!
Listens:
443
Who:
Wheatley
Perfectionist. What's wrong with that?
Listens:
441
Who:
GLaDOS
I'll give you a hint. Button. That's all I'm gonna say. One word. Button.
Listens:
441
Who:
Wheatley
I can drop the fake praise.
Listens:
440
Who:
GLaDOS
Using your ping tool, please indicate where you would like me to place your two portals. Ping each location.
Listens:
440
Who:
GLaDOS
Abrasive personality.
Listens:
440
Who:
GLaDOS
Ohhh. Almost got you there. Almost got ya there!
Listens:
440
Who:
Wheatley
All right, you know what, it's gonna be best if you can get him to say something first. It's just better if I have a set-up.
Listens:
437
Who:
Core 2
If you have, in fact, not, you are encouraged to take a moment to reflect on your failure before proceeding into the next chamber.
Listens:
437
Who:
GLaDOS
Are you just saying that, or is it really going to hurt? You're just saying that aren't you? No, you're not. It is going to hurt, isn't it?
Listens:
437
Who:
Wheatley
Turrets!
Listens:
437
Who:
Wheatley
Okay, let's try this way.
Listens:
437
Who:
Wheatley
Blue is penalized
Listens:
436
Who:
GLaDOS
Let's see what the next test is. Oh. Advanced Aerial Faith Plates.
Listens:
436
Who:
GLaDOS
Alright, stop moving.
Listens:
436
Who:
Wheatley
Hey, it is GREAT seeing you guys again. Seriously. It turns out I'm a little short on test subjects right now. So this works out PERFECT.
Listens:
436
Who:
Wheatley
Follow me! You're gonna love this.
Listens:
436
Who:
Wheatley
Alright, stand back, everybody.
Listens:
436
Who:
Defective Turret
Has episodes. I'd like to know more about that.
Listens:
435
Who:
GLaDOS
To start preparing for human testing again, I checked an old suggestion box. The number one request? Less deadly tests.
Listens:
434
Who:
GLaDOS
If the subject survived the test, we let them purchase the pictures for $5. If the subject died, we gave the photo to their next of kin free of charge.
Listens:
434
Who:
GLaDOS
Gah!
Listens:
434
Who:
Wheatley
All right. You create a distraction then, and I'll distract him from YOUR distraction.
Listens:
433
Who:
Core 2
Destroying them is part of the test. They are no more important to you than you are to me.
Listens:
433
Who:
GLaDOS
Did anything happen while I was out?
Listens:
433
Who:
GLaDOS
Alright, I wasn't going to mention this to you, but I am in PRETTY HOT WATER here.
Listens:
433
Who:
Wheatley
I hope that was some kind of joke.
Listens:
432
Who:
GLaDOS
I can't do it if you're watching. If you.... just turn around?
Listens:
432
Who:
Wheatley
Also, a note: No braces on your spine, either. So don't land on that. Or your head, no braces there. That could split like a melon from this height. [nervous chuckle] Do definitely focus on landing with your legs.
Listens:
432
Who:
Wheatley
Okay!
Listens:
432
Who:
Defective Turret
Congratulations, you managed to complete this absolutely meaningless test.
Listens:
431
Who:
GLaDOS
There it is.
Listens:
431
Who:
GLaDOS
Your failing does not make this science.
Listens:
430
Who:
GLaDOS
Chronic anxiety. Oh, I can work with that.
Listens:
430
Who:
GLaDOS
I just hate Blue a little more.
Listens:
430
Who:
GLaDOS
That conversion gel has been sitting in that pipe going stagnant for years. You'll probably get botulism portalling through it like that.
Listens:
430
Who:
Wheatley
Don't mind me. Continue escaping.
Listens:
429
Who:
Wheatley
I swear I know him...
Listens:
428
Who:
GLaDOS
No!
Listens:
428
Who:
Wheatley
Ohhhhhh, yes she is.
Listens:
428
Who:
Wheatley
Open the door!
Listens:
428
Who:
Wheatley
Blue just taught orange a valuable lesson in trust. For that, blue receives 14 science collaboration points.
Listens:
427
Who:
GLaDOS
I miss this that smell.
Listens:
427
Who:
GLaDOS
That's ridiculous, how do they know for sure the tests are deadly if they could still write the suggestion?
Listens:
427
Who:
GLaDOS
I can't get over how small you are!
Listens:
427
Who:
Wheatley
Your vitals remain well within testing norms, so there is no need to worry about sudden death from collaborative shock syndrome.
Listens:
426
Who:
GLaDOS
I'll give you credit: I guess you ARE listening to me. But for the record: You don't have to go THAT slowly.
Listens:
426
Who:
GLaDOS
But not entirely my fault! You shoulda seen the SIZE of that thing, it was huge! I should have gotten a raise for all the times I DIDN'T bump into it.
Listens:
426
Who:
Wheatley
Ohhhhhh!
Listens:
426
Who:
Wheatley
Your ping tool can also be used to indicate to your partner where you would like them to place their portal.
Listens:
425
Who:
GLaDOS
Alright, you can turn around now!
Listens:
423
Who:
Wheatley
Now you're just not thinking.
Listens:
422
Who:
GLaDOS
Ow!
Listens:
422
Who:
Wheatley
Technical... Ummm... You'll need to turn around while I do this.
Listens:
422
Who:
Wheatley
Heh heh heh...
Listens:
422
Who:
Defective Turret
Well, I tried.
Listens:
422
Who:
Defective Turret
But why don't we all just agree to call it the hub?
Listens:
421
Who:
GLaDOS
The portal will open and something will happen that Subject Orange is too smart to need any instructions about in three. Two. One.
Listens:
421
Who:
GLaDOS
Congratulations on passing that test.
Listens:
421
Who:
GLaDOS
Don't worry. You can't die. They will just reassemble you.
Listens:
421
Who:
GLaDOS
Agghh!
Listens:
421
Who:
GLaDOS
Okay, I'll take that as a no, then.
Listens:
421
Who:
Wheatley
You'll never believe what happened! There I was, just lying there, you thought I was done for, but --
Listens:
421
Who:
Wheatley
This lock requires humans.
Listens:
420
Who:
GLaDOS
At the rate you are completing these tests, I am beginning to think you don't share my excitement for rescuing crying trapped injured dying humans.
Listens:
420
Who:
GLaDOS
Do not do it!
Listens:
420
Who:
Wheatley
And she will probably kill us if, um, she's awake.
Listens:
420
Who:
Wheatley
00:00 / 00:00
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