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Portal 2
Portal 2 DLC
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Portal 1 Music
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TF2 Music
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So, when you kill that guy, do you have a cool line? You know, prepared? Tell you what: Lemme help you with that while you run around.
Listens:
498
Who:
Core 2
Please note the incandescent particle field across the exit. This Aperture Science Material Emancipation Grill will vaporize any unauthorized equipment that passes through it.
Listens:
996
Who:
Announcer
Get going. I'll fill you in along the way.
Listens:
645
Who:
GLaDOS
This is trouble.
Listens:
890
Who:
Defective Turret
Ahhh...
Listens:
623
Who:
Wheatley
Remember when I told you that he was specifically designed to make bad decisions? Because I think he's decided not to maintain any of the crucial functions required to keep this facility from exploding.
Listens:
492
Who:
GLaDOS
Ah! Brilliant. You made it through, well done.
Listens:
376
Who:
Wheatley
Come back!
Listens:
451
Who:
Wheatley
NO!
Listens:
538
Who:
GLaDOS
There you are! I was starting to get worried.
Listens:
278
Who:
Wheatley
It's like you're just machines.
Listens:
272
Who:
GLaDOS
For that Blue is penalized fifty science collaboration points.
Listens:
943
Who:
GLaDOS
Do you know who dances around like an imbecile when they accomplish the tiniest little thing?
Listens:
532
Who:
GLaDOS
Put me in the game, coach!
Listens:
953
Who:
Defective Turret
GO.
Listens:
1052
Who:
GLaDOS
Perhaps I should have specified. Teamwork is a concept in which two or more people work together, usually with a goal of not failing horribly.
Listens:
658
Who:
GLaDOS
This close and that's what you do?
Listens:
303
Who:
GLaDOS
SOLVE IT! Commanding voice...
Listens:
733
Who:
Wheatley
You seem to have defeated its load-bearing capacity. Well done. I'll just lower the ceiling.
Listens:
509
Who:
GLaDOS
We're so close! Go press the button!
Listens:
1429
Who:
GLaDOS
We're running out of time...
Listens:
352
Who:
GLaDOS
Okay, I'm about to start hacking. It's a little more complicated than it looked from your side. It should take about ten minutes. Keep one eye on the door.
Listens:
703
Who:
Wheatley
I'm still here, I'm still working, I haven't forgotten about you!
Listens:
281
Who:
Wheatley
I would say extremely deadly but we all know, for you and your amazing ability to be reassembled nothing is deadly.
Listens:
313
Who:
GLaDOS
Remember when I told you that you were the only subjects to pass the calibration tests?
Listens:
313
Who:
GLaDOS
Mr. Johnson...
Listens:
1396
Who:
Caroline
Just---if you just--okay, just stand by the podium and just look up.
Listens:
276
Who:
Wheatley
Be a shame to miss it, wouldn't it? Just for the old neurotoxin. Neurotoxin will still be here tomorrow. Whereas that bird will be gone any minute. Already got one talon off the branch. Gonna be gone.
Listens:
574
Who:
Wheatley
That will give you PLENTY of time to chat.
Listens:
351
Who:
GLaDOS
You think I'll betray you. And on any other day, you'd be right.
Listens:
388
Who:
GLaDOS
Ohhh. Remember when you picked me up? Five seconds ago! Ohhh, that was amazing! Do it again, pick me up again!
Listens:
398
Who:
Wheatley
Don't listen to her, do it.
Listens:
293
Who:
Wheatley
'Hang ten?' That might work if there were ten of him. Do you think there might be nine more of this guy somewhere?
Listens:
630
Who:
Core 2
It's been fun. Don't come back.
Listens:
3765
Who:
GLaDOS
How's that taste, pal?
Listens:
430
Who:
Core 2
This next test applies the principles of momentum to movement through portals. If the laws of physics no longer apply in the future, God help you.
Listens:
3874
Who:
Announcer
Oh. You MIGHT want to hang onto to something. Word of advice, up to you.
Listens:
293
Who:
Wheatley
89% of magic tricks are not magic. Technically, they are sorcery.
Listens:
2394
Who:
Core 3
Ow.
Listens:
505
Who:
Wheatley
Hot water freezes quicker than cold water.
Listens:
625
Who:
Core 3
There should be a portal device on that podium over there.
Listens:
287
Who:
Wheatley
Holmes versus Moriarty.
Listens:
2163
Who:
Wheatley
Not so fast!
Listens:
567
Who:
GLaDOS
Correct Blue, Orange can't hear you.
Listens:
283
Who:
GLaDOS
It wasn't anything personal. Just... you know. You DID kill me. Fair's fair.
Listens:
489
Who:
GLaDOS
Her name is Caroline.
Listens:
4258
Who:
Turret
What are you doing no no no no no!
Listens:
1024
Who:
Defective Turret
Well... Good. Good. Finally, a nemesis worthy of my vast intellect.
Listens:
681
Who:
Wheatley
Passive-aggressive.
Listens:
415
Who:
GLaDOS
Hello! This is the part where I kill you.
Listens:
107444
Who:
Wheatley
Alright, I wasn't going to mention this to you, but I am in PRETTY HOT WATER here.
Listens:
356
Who:
Wheatley
Anyway, don't smudge up the glass down there. In fact, why don't you just go ahead and not touch anything unless it's test related.
Listens:
1024
Who:
Cave Johnson
Yes.
Listens:
589
Who:
GLaDOS
Hello?
Listens:
2901
Who:
Turret
Since making test participation mandatory for all employees, the quality of our test subjects has risen dramatically. Employee retention, however, has not.
Listens:
2911
Who:
Cave Johnson
See you at the bottom. Good luck!
Listens:
305
Who:
Wheatley
Hold on, I'll stop the elevator. Anything? Take your time...
Listens:
426
Who:
GLaDOS
Give up? Also the floor. Was the answer that time. Same as before. Still on the floor.
Listens:
277
Who:
Wheatley
Don't like space. Don't like space.
Listens:
3840
Who:
Core 1
Searching
Listens:
902
Who:
Turret
Yeah! Still not working.
Listens:
706
Who:
Defective Turret
Did you notice I didn't even stay to the end of your last test?
Listens:
277
Who:
GLaDOS
Oh, it's a core you've put on me! Who told you to do that? Was it her? [as if he's looking around] It's just making me stronger, luv! It's a fool's errand!
Listens:
2706
Who:
Wheatley
Oh great, dancing again.
Listens:
773
Who:
GLaDOS
Just turn around.
Listens:
275
Who:
Wheatley
Oh, in case you got covered in that repulsion gel, here's some advice the lab boys gave me: DO NOT get covered in the repulsion gel.
Listens:
2279
Who:
Cave Johnson
Woooo! I KNEW this would be fun. They told me it wasn't fun at all, and I BELIEVED 'em! Ah! I'm loving this! Whale of a time...
Listens:
621
Who:
Wheatley
Oh no! nonononono!
Listens:
14220
Who:
Wheatley
Never completes work.
Listens:
280
Who:
GLaDOS
Allright, what have we got?
Listens:
268
Who:
Wheatley
Initiating surprise in three... two... one.
Listens:
3520
Who:
GLaDOS
Oh! Sorry. The lift. Sorry. I keep forgetting.
Listens:
448
Who:
Wheatley
Thank you for completing the testing courses. If you enjoyed your experience, you may now re-enter the testing course of your choice.
Listens:
888
Who:
Announcer
We will attempt to comply with these now non-existent agencies by playing some more smooth jazz.
Listens:
3253
Who:
Announcer
Aggressive. I like that.
Listens:
908
Who:
GLaDOS
The portal will open and emergency testing will begin in three. Two. One.
Listens:
1973
Who:
Announcer
Template missing. Continuing from memory.
Listens:
1230
Who:
Announcer
Caroline deleted.
Listens:
21507
Who:
Announcer
Diamonds are made when coal is put under intense pressure. Diamonds put under intense pressure become foam pellets, commonly used today as packing material.
Listens:
1838
Who:
Core 3
clickclickclick
Listens:
530
Who:
Defective Turret
What are you doing in there?
Listens:
283
Who:
Wheatley
This is just a thought experiment, just to see how much time you'll waste thinking about these worthless documents. The correct time is zero seconds.
Listens:
452
Who:
GLaDOS
It is tricky. It is tricky. But just... plug me in, please.
Listens:
275
Who:
Wheatley
Sorry about the mess. I've really let the place go since you killed me. By the way, thanks for that.
Listens:
1299
Who:
GLaDOS
Are you doing that just to aggravate me?
Listens:
272
Who:
GLaDOS
Good morning. You have been in suspension for -FIFTY- days. In compliance with state and federal regulations, all testing candidates in the Aperture Science Extended Relaxation Center must be revived periodically for a mandatory physical and mental wellness exercise.
Listens:
10065
Who:
Announcer
Okay, you win.
Listens:
866
Who:
Turret
I can't get over how small you are!
Listens:
390
Who:
Wheatley
Hello?
Listens:
2216
Who:
Turret
What, are you still alive? You are joking. You have got be kidding me. Well, I'm still in control. AND I HAVE NO IDEA HOW TO FIX THIS PLACE.
Listens:
6176
Who:
Wheatley
Space space going to space oh boy
Listens:
2120
Who:
Core 1
Are you just saying that, or is it really going to hurt? You're just saying that aren't you? No, you're not. It is going to hurt, isn't it?
Listens:
421
Who:
Wheatley
What are you doing? YOU MONSTER! They're one of us.
Listens:
7156
Who:
GLaDOS
*cough* Button.
Listens:
1273
Who:
Wheatley
I hate you so much.
Listens:
13262
Who:
GLaDOS
We're back!
Listens:
2037
Who:
Defective Turret
Try to make your way back out here!
Listens:
290
Who:
Wheatley
Hey! How's it going? Here I am again!
Listens:
291
Who:
Wheatley
clickclickclick
Listens:
823
Who:
Defective Turret
I was confident you could finish.
Listens:
286
Who:
GLaDOS
00:00 / 00:00
Test Player
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