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Portal 2
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TF2 Music
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Congratulations on completing that test. But something seems off.
Listens:
295
Who:
GLaDOS
Wait. Why DID you trundle over here? You're not HUNGRY, are you? It's hard to see, what's that in your hand? Knowing you it's a deep fryer.
Listens:
3683
Who:
GLaDOS
Blah.
Listens:
1420
Who:
GLaDOS
Ow. I hate this bird.
Listens:
1999
Who:
GLaDOS
Oh no, I'm one of the bad ones, aren't I?
Listens:
1101
Who:
Defective Turret
China produces the world's second largest crop of soybeans.
Listens:
590
Who:
Core 3
No hard fealings
Listens:
1093
Who:
Turret
AGH! You look TERRIB--you look good. Looking good, actually. If I'm honest.
Listens:
816
Who:
Wheatley
Blue now has a Portal Device. Finally.
Listens:
539
Who:
GLaDOS
Oh, hang on. What if we gave it something ELSE to scan?
Listens:
324
Who:
Wheatley
Look, an eclipse! No. Don't look.
Listens:
1575
Who:
Core 1
If you had any belongings, please pick them up now. We don't want old newspapers and sticks cluttering up the building.
Listens:
1014
Who:
Cave Johnson
Dang!
Listens:
557
Who:
Defective Turret
You know who ended up, do you know who ended up taking her down in the end? You're not going to believe this. A human.
Listens:
306
Who:
Wheatley
Oh, brilliant, yeah. Take one last look at your precious human moon. Because it cannot help you now!
Listens:
2576
Who:
Wheatley
Lacks confidence.
Listens:
295
Who:
GLaDOS
Orange, blue isn't a human. The lesson on trust only needs to be taught once. Orange is penalized 1 science collaboration point.
Listens:
355
Who:
GLaDOS
...What are you doing?...
Listens:
1284
Who:
GLaDOS
Don't plug him in.
Listens:
481
Who:
GLaDOS
That is a potato battery. It's a toy for children. And now she lives in it.
Listens:
3763
Who:
Wheatley
Impossible as it is to imagine, there actually is a solution. Devilishly hidden.
Listens:
336
Who:
Wheatley
Wanna go to earth wanna go to earth wanna go to earth wanna go to earth. Wanna go to earth.
Listens:
2612
Who:
Core 1
And again, not playing along. You're ruining what are some really good speeches, actually.
Listens:
453
Who:
Wheatley
Wait! I've got an idea!
Listens:
407
Who:
GLaDOS
Oops. You trapped yourself. I guess that's it then. Thanks for testing. You may as well lie down and get acclimated to the being dead position.
Listens:
1535
Who:
GLaDOS
Did you think that would be funny?
Listens:
525
Who:
GLaDOS
Honey does not spoil.
Listens:
639
Who:
Core 3
Come on! We have to go!
Listens:
287
Who:
Wheatley
Orange do what Blue just did.
Listens:
299
Who:
GLaDOS
I am going to risk having you go outside the official courses one more time.
Listens:
308
Who:
GLaDOS
Space. Space.
Listens:
1770
Who:
Core 1
To maintain a constant testing cycle, I simulate daylight at all hours and add adrenal vapor to your oxygen supply. So you may be confused about the passage of time. The point is, yesterday was your birthday. I thought you'd want to know.
Listens:
3748
Who:
GLaDOS
Ohhh. Remember when you picked me up? Five seconds ago! Ohhh, that was amazing! Do it again, pick me up again!
Listens:
416
Who:
Wheatley
While I should have left both of you trapped there forever, I do need you for something else.
Listens:
294
Who:
GLaDOS
Searching
Listens:
914
Who:
Turret
You will hear a buzzer. When you hear the buzzer, look up at the ceiling. [BUZZER]
Listens:
3077
Who:
Announcer
Before re-entering a relaxation vault at the conclusion of testing, please take a moment to write down the results of your test. An Aperture Science Reintegration Associate will revive you for an interview when society has been rebuilt.
Listens:
1213
Who:
Announcer
Anyway, look, the point is we're gonna break out of here, alright? But we can't do it yet. Look for me fifteen chambers ahead.
Listens:
365
Who:
Wheatley
Was. Was self-destructing. Already fixed.
Listens:
636
Who:
Wheatley
The Fact Sphere is always right.
Listens:
774
Who:
Core 3
Do not press that button!
Listens:
541
Who:
Wheatley
Look down. Who's that, down there, talking? It's me! Down on the floor. Needing you to pick me up.
Listens:
460
Who:
Wheatley
Warning: Core corruption at 100 percent.
Listens:
6737
Who:
Announcer
Have you got any ideas?
Listens:
302
Who:
Wheatley
Agggh, not again!
Listens:
571
Who:
Defective Turret
Oh. Play it cool. Play it cool. Here come the space cops.
Listens:
5239
Who:
Core 1
This place is going to blow up if I don't get back in my body!
Listens:
365
Who:
GLaDOS
Might want to just pick me up.
Listens:
286
Who:
Wheatley
Sorry. That just slipped out. A bit insensitive. Umm... The smelly humans...
Listens:
566
Who:
Wheatley
That jumpsuit you're wearing looks stupid. That's not me talking, it's right here in your file. On other people it looks fine, but right here a scientist has noted that on you it looks 'stupid.'
Listens:
2663
Who:
GLaDOS
Hey, safe travels, there.
Listens:
395
Who:
Defective Turret
Just hang in there for five more - What? Jerry, you can't fire me for that! Yes, JERRY -- OR, maybe your prejudiced worksite should have accommodated a nanobot of my size. Thanks for the hate crime, Jer!
Listens:
1367
Who:
Wheatley
Those of you helping us test the repulsion gel today, just follow the blue line on the floor.
Listens:
1047
Who:
Cave Johnson
Really? Alright.
Listens:
394
Who:
Defective Turret
You're no longer bothering me. You're only hurting my impression of you.
Listens:
449
Who:
GLaDOS
Well, can't win 'em all...
Listens:
532
Who:
Defective Turret
Is it fun when you degrade yourselves like that?
Listens:
1245
Who:
GLaDOS
eight
Listens:
589
Who:
GLaDOS
I don't want this!
Listens:
19423
Who:
Caroline
Oh, that port looks comfy. Why don't you put me on it, please.
Listens:
294
Who:
Wheatley
Good luck!
Listens:
382
Who:
Wheatley
Technical... Ummm... You'll need to turn around while I do this.
Listens:
420
Who:
Wheatley
Fears intimacy.
Listens:
297
Who:
GLaDOS
Have you worked out the one good trait humans have, yet?
Listens:
573
Who:
GLaDOS
The upcoming tests require you to work together as a team.
Listens:
387
Who:
GLaDOS
Try to avoid the garbage hurtling towards you.
Listens:
600
Who:
GLaDOS
Go ahead, plug me in.
Listens:
359
Who:
GLaDOS
On the floor. Needing your help. The whole time. All the time. Needing your help.
Listens:
310
Who:
Wheatley
ow.
Listens:
539
Who:
GLaDOS
Don't plug him in.
Listens:
364
Who:
GLaDOS
Ohhhhhh, we just made it! That was close.
Listens:
292
Who:
Wheatley
No! No! NONONO!
Listens:
1072
Who:
Wheatley
Yes. Please. Space.
Listens:
1063
Who:
Core 1
Second time's a charm...
Listens:
788
Who:
Defective Turret
Hello?
Listens:
1359
Who:
Turret
Please go to space.
Listens:
1023
Who:
Core 1
[beep] Sarcasm Self Test complete. [beep]
Listens:
314055
Who:
Announcer
I don't think I want to go through that again.
Listens:
355
Who:
GLaDOS
I trust you. You are my favorite cooperative testing subject.
Listens:
315
Who:
GLaDOS
Warning! All testing courses are currently available.
Listens:
2182
Who:
Announcer
Look!
Listens:
458
Who:
GLaDOS
Look who's back, were you scared to continue those tests?
Listens:
315
Who:
GLaDOS
You are making this harder than it needs to be.
Listens:
295
Who:
GLaDOS
Well, hello, stranger!
Listens:
3872
Who:
Defective Turret
Really? Okay.
Listens:
1056
Who:
GLaDOS
Yes, alright, okay. This is getting tiresome. I'm surprised you haven't got anything better to do. I know I have. You've proven you can break screens. Proven. Factual. Well done. Good. Aren't you little miss clever. Little miss smashy-smash.
Listens:
1408
Who:
Wheatley
Hello?
Listens:
1279
Who:
Wheatley
Hey.
Listens:
810
Who:
Core 1
I can't see a thing. What just happened? Better open fire! [click click click click] Dang!
Listens:
20937
Who:
Defective Turret
She was provoking you.
Listens:
834
Who:
Turret
So. How are you holding up?
Listens:
2491
Who:
GLaDOS
Anyway, look, we're really close to busting out, just hang in there for five more chambers.
Listens:
298
Who:
Wheatley
Great work! Because this message is prerecorded, any observations related to your performance are speculation on our part. Please disregard any undeserved compliments.
Listens:
3046
Who:
Announcer
Only one more test after this.
Listens:
301
Who:
GLaDOS
Click click click! Still defective!
Listens:
2404
Who:
Defective Turret
This final course is training to reach the human vault. So this actually has a purpose. Those other courses were fun, but let's be honest, I need human test subjects for it to be science.
Listens:
392
Who:
GLaDOS
I let him keep his job. I'm not a monster. Ignore what he's saying, though. Keep testing.
Listens:
715
Who:
Wheatley
Humans find that an admirable trait.
Listens:
322
Who:
GLaDOS
Yes, I see you, and no, I don't care.
Listens:
5397
Who:
GLaDOS
It's perfect. Except for all the glass hitting us when I smash through the lift, that's a bit of a problem.
Listens:
306
Who:
Wheatley
00:00 / 00:00
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