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Portal 2
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While it may appear that I am only tracking your accomplishments using science collaboration points, the truth is every aspect of your performance will be reflected in your final score.
Listens:
385
Who:
GLaDOS
Agggh! I'm on fire!
Listens:
7315
Who:
Defective Turret
Look at that, it's growing right up into the ceiling. The whole place is probably overrun with potatoes at this point. At least you won't starve, though.
Listens:
1627
Who:
Wheatley
89% of magic tricks are not magic. Technically, they are sorcery.
Listens:
2466
Who:
Core 3
AGH! You look TERRIB--you look good. Looking good, actually. If I'm honest.
Listens:
816
Who:
Wheatley
Test chamber completed. In the interest of - [FADES OUT] [FADES IN] I am now talking to you privately. Do not tell your teammate. Just between you and me? You're doing very well. [FADES BACK IN] One hundred and seven.
Listens:
1443
Who:
GLaDOS
Could you turn around? Is that possible?
Listens:
290
Who:
Wheatley
I tell you, if I was up against impossible odds, this is the way I'd want to go out: mashed with dignity. That'd be the way I'd choose.
Listens:
374
Who:
Wheatley
Look, an eclipse! No. Don't look.
Listens:
1575
Who:
Core 1
Alright, then. Let us see... 'Vital maintenance protocols.' Wow, there are a lot of them. Should have looked into this earlier. Well, let's try this: [reading while typing] DO THEM. [failure buzzer]. Fair enough. Maybe it's a password.
Listens:
2571
Who:
Wheatley
Yes.
Listens:
632
Who:
GLaDOS
There we go. Lights on.
Listens:
332
Who:
Wheatley
Bring your daughter to work day. That did not end well.
Listens:
671
Who:
Wheatley
Watching you try to sabotage one other, I'm amazed you're still on friendly terms.
Listens:
324
Who:
GLaDOS
Don't be a stranger!
Listens:
407
Who:
Defective Turret
Slapping hands. That accomplishes something.
Listens:
365
Who:
GLaDOS
Yeah! Let's do this!
Listens:
572
Who:
Defective Turret
With humans, I would have called that a successful test.
Listens:
300
Who:
GLaDOS
Thought you'd seen the last of us, didn't ya?
Listens:
718
Who:
Defective Turret
The Fact Sphere is always right.
Listens:
774
Who:
Core 3
Still, though, let's get mad! If we're going to explode, let's at least explode with some dignity.
Listens:
1920
Who:
GLaDOS
And he'll probably kill us, because he's incredibly powerful and I have no plan.
Listens:
851
Who:
GLaDOS
This next test involves discouragement redirection cubes. I'd just finished building them before you had your, well, episode. So now we'll both get to see how they work.
Listens:
539
Who:
GLaDOS
Just remember to land on one foot...
Listens:
399
Who:
GLaDOS
The Fact Sphere is the most intelligent sphere.
Listens:
836
Who:
Core 3
Well. Have fun soaring through the air without a care in the world.
Listens:
674
Who:
GLaDOS
Oo. Oo. Oo. Lady. Oo. Lady. Oo. Let's go to space.
Listens:
18922
Who:
Core 1
Feeds off the misery of others.
Listens:
289
Who:
GLaDOS
Don't you DARE plug him in.
Listens:
673
Who:
GLaDOS
Ohhhhhh, we just made it! That was close.
Listens:
292
Who:
Wheatley
Really? You’re just going to blatantly cheat?
Listens:
722
Who:
GLaDOS
Yeah! Let's do this!
Listens:
649
Who:
Defective Turret
Space.
Listens:
1033
Who:
Core 1
Look - metal ball, I CAN hear you.
Listens:
1835
Who:
GLaDOS
I’m flyinnnng!
Listens:
2534
Who:
Turret
Okay, almost there. On the other side of that wall is one of the old testing tracks. There's a piece of equipment in there we're gonna need to get out of here. I think this is a docking station. Get ready...
Listens:
366
Who:
Wheatley
Okay. New plan. Act natural. We've done NOTHING wrong.
Listens:
512
Who:
Wheatley
SPACE!
Listens:
21713
Who:
Wheatley
Have I ever told you the qualities I love most in you? In order: Number one: resolving things, love the ways you resolve things. Particularly disputes. Number one, tied: Button-pushing. Two things I love about you: Button pushing and the ability to resolve things. Chiefly disputes.
Listens:
726
Who:
Wheatley
Orange, blue isn't a human. The lesson on trust only needs to be taught once. Orange is penalized 1 science collaboration point.
Listens:
355
Who:
GLaDOS
Orange is awarded five points!
Listens:
290
Who:
GLaDOS
No! NO! NO! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-
Listens:
73766
Who:
GLaDOS
Space space wanna go to space
Listens:
1031
Who:
Core 1
ahhhhEHHHHHH!
Listens:
1357
Who:
Wheatley
I’ve been listening to Orange talk and I don’t know how you put up with it, I really don’t. You have the patience of a saint.
Listens:
521
Who:
GLaDOS
Ahahaha
Listens:
2131
Who:
Turret
Substitute core, are you ready to start the procedure?
Listens:
1334
Who:
Announcer
Ohh. You're gonna laugh at this. You know how I said there was absolutely no way to get here without going through her lair and her potentially killing us? Could have gone through here. [laughs] My fault. Bit of luck for us that she wasn't switched on.
Listens:
1529
Who:
Wheatley
Well, enough about that first person's file. Let's look at some others.
Listens:
403
Who:
GLaDOS
They'll probably throw you a party.
Listens:
451
Who:
GLaDOS
Do NOT plug that little idiot into MY mainframe.
Listens:
1905
Who:
GLaDOS
Pop a portal. Behind me, on the wall. Come on through.
Listens:
308
Who:
Wheatley
Sometimes testing has to occur outside the confines of the lab.
Listens:
302
Who:
GLaDOS
I'm guessing this wasn't one of the scientist's children. I don't want to be snobby, but let's be honest: It's got manual laborer written all over it. I'm not saying they're not as good as the professionals. They're just a lot dumber.
Listens:
646
Who:
Wheatley
Excuse me?
Listens:
867
Who:
Turret
I'm gonna make you proud!
Listens:
689
Who:
Defective Turret
The automobile brake was not invented until 1895. Before this, someone had to remain in the car at all times, driving in circles until passengers returned from their errands.
Listens:
1099
Who:
Core 3
Hold on, I'll stop the elevator. Anything? Take your time...
Listens:
460
Who:
GLaDOS
[tired breathing] Nevermind. Nevermind. Solve it yourself. You're on your own.
Listens:
535
Who:
Wheatley
Which involves deadly lasers and how test subjects react when locked in a room with deadly lasers.
Listens:
1052
Who:
GLaDOS
Illegal operation
Listens:
1198
Who:
Turret
This isn't fair!
Listens:
684
Who:
Defective Turret
Try one of those childish gestures.
Listens:
476
Who:
GLaDOS
Goodbye, Caroline.
Listens:
20776
Who:
GLaDOS
Hey lady. Lady. I'm the best. I'm the best at space.
Listens:
3133
Who:
Core 1
Don't listen to her, do it.
Listens:
305
Who:
Wheatley
Yeah! Non-lethal as ever.
Listens:
900
Who:
Defective Turret
Say one useful thing. One. I dare you. I will give you a hundred dollars if you say one thing remotely applicable to anything at all.
Listens:
1412
Who:
Core 2
We are only two tests away from reaching the humans, are you as excited as I am?
Listens:
289
Who:
GLaDOS
You failed so many times in this test, I thought you were becoming human. But then you would just come back again and again and again.
Listens:
531
Who:
GLaDOS
Sorry, what?
Listens:
2246
Who:
Wheatley
Don't press it! COME BACK!
Listens:
973
Who:
Wheatley
But the real point is - oh, oh! You know what I've just remembered? Football! Kicking a ball around for fun. Cruel, obviously. Humans love it. Metaphor. Should have seen this coming.
Listens:
2219
Who:
Wheatley
Space going to space can't wait.
Listens:
3129
Who:
Core 1
To start preparing for human testing again, I checked an old suggestion box. The number one request? Less deadly tests.
Listens:
432
Who:
GLaDOS
Ha! Missed me that time. Ohhh, you were solving-nevermind, carry on. My fault.
Listens:
488
Who:
Wheatley
Hello?
Listens:
2575
Who:
Turret
Touche, young lady, touche.
Listens:
1270
Who:
Defective Turret
Right. Well, I’m going to take this rail down the back way.
Listens:
374
Who:
Wheatley
Ayeyeyeyeye
Listens:
3931
Who:
Turret
Hey, a countdown clock! Man, that is trouble. Situation's looking pretty ugly. For such a beautiful woman. If you don't mind me saying.
Listens:
1357
Who:
Core 2
Target aquired.
Listens:
2318
Who:
Turret
There is a framed painting on the wall. Please go stand in front of it.
Listens:
1467
Who:
Announcer
Hold on now. I might not have thought this next part COMPLETELY through.
Listens:
339
Who:
Wheatley
Goodbye
Listens:
8705
Who:
Turret
This course was created and then abandoned by humans. They tend to do that, create something wonderful and then abandon it.
Listens:
989
Who:
GLaDOS
Now, if you're part of Control Group Kepler-Seven, we implanted a tiny microchip about the size of a postcard into your skull. Most likely you've forgotten it's even there, but if it starts vibrating and beeping during this next test, let us know, because that means it's about to hit five hundred degrees, so we're gonna need to go ahead and get that out of you pretty fast.
Listens:
3899
Who:
Cave Johnson
Press the button again.
Listens:
1087
Who:
GLaDOS
And guess what? Ground up moon rocks are pure poison. I am deathly ill.
Listens:
6495
Who:
Cave Johnson
Anyone got any bullets?
Listens:
672
Who:
Defective Turret
Try to avoid the garbage hurtling towards you.
Listens:
600
Who:
GLaDOS
If you're going to hit each other, at least aim for the head.
Listens:
298
Who:
GLaDOS
No, listen to me! Sir, I do not want this!
Listens:
18908
Who:
Caroline
Alalalawl
Listens:
5660
Who:
Turret
Dreams are the subconscious mind's way of reminding people to go to school naked and have their teeth fall out.
Listens:
1316
Who:
Core 3
All we had to do was pull that lever.
Listens:
601
Who:
GLaDOS
You should see yourselves right now.
Listens:
1364
Who:
GLaDOS
Come on come on come on!
Listens:
320
Who:
Wheatley
Never listens.
Listens:
391
Who:
GLaDOS
Pshh. Really? And do what, exactly?
Listens:
633
Who:
Wheatley
00:00 / 00:00
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